Suicide is not the answer.

I agree with this too. The Gnostic Christians believe everything is opposite the other way around. That we are the dead ones. Instead of experiencing our right as Co Creators of love and light, we helplessly stare out of bodies that we did not create nor choose, and that is if our parents didnt abort us ! They believe we were born into our sepulcre that our body is our tomb. That we are the dead ones.

Imagine if thats what the Egyptians believed, that death was actually life and their mummifications were actually celebrating leaving this death state into real life.

Hi my dear friend. What a crazyness of posts and derivations yesterday, eh?

Last Edited by Inerrancia on 10/10/2013 08:22 AM

Hello darling, yes, some truly amazing people and posts! How are you today?

Yes, some intense stuff and amazing people indeed. I'm fine, it's a bit windy over here (the Fall, you know) but the Sun is high and warm up there. I'm in a good mood today, I guess What about you? You're pretty in your new avatar!

And I'm so sorry for yours. There are many, many people affected by suicide.....too many.

This was written by Josh for his wife who passed from cancer. It's titled
*I miss you* and is simply beautiful!


[link to soundcloud.com (secure)]

Good morning Darling. Have a very nice day, my best wishes for you

You too my lovely, happy Friday!

My heart goes out to you. I know the devastation suicide causes. If I could give you some advice it would be to keep living, do something positive with it. Set a limit on your grief. Say " Today I will laugh, today I will see beauty"

My brother committed suicide and my mother used it to hurt people. She hurt my dad, our friends, myself, she hurt everyone. For 30 years she used it to make people feel guilty and to get out of taking responsibility for her actions.

It turned her into someone who was very uncomfortable till be around. She missed out on 30 years of happiness.

You did nothing wrong, you were not the cause of her actions. Allow people to help you, they need that and you do too. Just please do what you can to make sure your family and friends are allowed to grieve with you, not for you.

Oh darling, I'm so sorry for your loss :( thankfully we grieve together in the knowledge that we did everything that we could as a family, both extended and nuclear, to help Sophie. Bi polar is a frightening disorder, no guilt, just sadness mixed with understanding and disbelief. Thankyou for your post

I agree with you about music, ANHEDONIC. Looking back on my musical choices, I see why I had mood issues when I was younger.

Also, I think part of "music therapy" is to start with music that reflects where you are, and gently move toward where you want to be in your mood. (I realize that's overly simplistic). However, one can be so stuck in a mindset, it's hard to imagine another reality, much less apprecaite its supposed benefits.

OP: Thought of you yesterday when a friend of mine shared he lost a relative to suicide. I pray that you and everyone with this indescribable pain find a sense of peace and rest. Once again, may this thread prevent many from even contemplating the idea.

I also ask your forgiveness for the off-topic conversations yesterday.

Peace to you.

Hi Ele, I thought I had posted on here, but I was struggling with what to write, so maybe decided against it...

I'm so sorry to hear about your daughter, it must have been one of the most painful experiences that anyone could endure and my thoughts are with you.
I have suffered with depression on and off for many years, periods so dark that I couldn't drive past a bridge without having to fight the urge to jump from it... While in that headspace it was like tunnel vision, I thought nothing about the effects it would have on my mum, my siblings, my friends, even my son... It's hard for anyone who hasn't suffered to understand, but you can be assured that it can be one of the darkest times in a persons life. All I know is that at no point did I care any less about the people around me, and I'm sure the same would have been for her too.

I can't pretend to know how you are feeling, but offer my deepest sympathy to you. Remember that, whatever your beliefs, you will be reunited one day, be it in Heaven, Jannah, Tian, Nirvana... or returning to the atomic structure of this amazing universe.

omg

not easy and hard to understand :(

Thankyou for your kind words, you don't know how appreciated they are

No forgiveness needed, hopefully this thread will be a friendly ear to all those in need of one :)

You know, Dude, the strongest people are those who have suffered. Your strength shines out, thankyou!

It would also seem that the ones that knew the person also go through a specif condition that is an addition to the grief felt by any person when they lose someone they love to death via any means.

In that the only 'cure' would seem to be given another opportunity to ward off a needless death. Since that will never happen the next best thing would be to gain as much knowledge as you can about intervention and then look around for those 'hidden signs' in other people you care about. If you don't find any then that is good news and that should help you resolve that part of grief and many new people will be looking at suicide as their best alternative and for some it might actually be the best choice. Ie, and aged person who has to walk 100 miles to get to safety from a natural disaster. With no one to help him he will die at about mile 50, or he can die at mile 0 by taking his own life at the right time which could be a lot longer than it would take to walk the 50 miles.

That's what I try to do....unfortunately it's not always appreciated in the spirit in which it's given :((

Hi,

My girlfriend commited suicide, I found her in a forest, hanging in a tree we used to climb. When I held her she felt so light, there was a note she left behind explaining it wasn't my fault and I should never give up.

It has been 10 years now but I remember as it was yesterday.

Sometimes I think about suicide myself. But I could never do it because I've learnt about the grief and hurt it causes with your loved ones, thats why I hold on.

Oh my love, my heart feels for you. I found my daughter too and it's an image that never gets erased. What a strong, loving soul you are. I'm always here if you want to talk, please remember that. You're not alone in your sadness or experience xx

I can't tell you why or how to survive. I can give time. I've plenty of that :)

Nor should it, however it is better for you if you are the one in control of when and where those images come back.

Grief for somebody who has lived a long and healthy life should last no longer than 30 days (in theory) before the weeping stops. If the time remembered is before the death and a month after the memories should be able to be recalled without tears, go into that month and you shouldn't be able to stop them (as long as your originally had some) That isn't lessening the memory or the importance of the person, it is a tool to help the survivors cope so that they can care as much for others and know the grief that will come should that relationship end before its natural time. I haven't had to deal with this specific kind of grief but for some things in the past if my thought enter that specific time I turn into a basket case for the time I remember it.

I'm not sure if I have ever heard of an intervention that was welcomed before the end results were being realized. I wish for the good old days where you just drag them along to the 'solution'. Partially successful, time to become 'underhanded' and 'manipulative' and 'subtle'. No demands, no pushes, no ultimatums but you watch them like a hawk as far as body language goes because unless they are somewhat determined that their current path is the right one their body will have little triggers that go off when they hear certain things. Startles is a word sometimes used but there are ones where the cause is a lot more subtle but just as telling. If you can spot those and determine the cause you may have found a crack that you can work on, if it leads to the outcome desired which has to be about them rather than me so I don't have to experience things that I should but would also like to avoid if at all possible.

The old saying about leading a horse to water but not being able to make him drink is not as doomed as it sounds. You do not take them to the water unless they show signs of being thirsty first (triggers). If you do get there and they don't drink then you wait until they do get thirsty and then they will drink.

That waiting part maybe somebody not wanting help when they are 25 but quite willing to 'listen' when they are 35. The ultimate in 'subtle' is be loving proof yourself that real change can take place that leaves the 'owner of the body' in full control of the mind. That going to require you to be able to honestly be able to put grief oh hold and be able to experience the emotion that is the opposite of grief. (preferably a spontaneous reaction to all the various little events that a person experiences in any given day)

Religious types will tell you that it is all part of 'the plan', perhaps they are right, who knows?

The old adage "what doesn't kill us, makes us stronger" has never been truer.

Your body gave you about a pound of adrenalin from the time you first saw her until you were holding her.

Last Edited by MHz on 10/13/2013 04:14 PM

Actually the message is quite long so it must have some importance to God the we understand death is a temporary separation between us and God and between us and the other flesh that came into our lives. The deed to make that clear was pretty dramatic in itself.

M't:2:16:
Then Herod,
when he saw that he was mocked of the wise men,
was exceeding wroth,
and sent forth,
and slew all the children that were in Bethlehem,
and in all the coasts thereof,
from two years old and under,
according to the time which he had diligently enquired of the wise men.
M't:2:17:
Then was fulfilled that which was spoken by Jeremy the prophet,
saying,
M't:2:18:
In Rama was there a voice heard,
lamentation,
and weeping,
and great mourning,
Rachel weeping for her children,
and would not be comforted,
because they are not.

Jer:31:15:
Thus saith the LORD;
A voice was heard in Ramah,
lamentation,
and bitter weeping;
Rahel weeping for her children refused to be comforted for her children,
because they were not.
Jer:31:16:
Thus saith the LORD;
Refrain thy voice from weeping,
and thine eyes from tears:
for thy work shall be rewarded,
saith the LORD;
and they shall come again from the land of the enemy.
Jer:31:17:
And there is hope in thine end,
saith the LORD,
that thy children shall come again to their own border.

Conception in the Bible is when manes are written into the Book of life. salvation comes in two phases, a first and a last. The first are the ones in the book of life that fit the Re:20:4 list.

The 30 days mourning is even from Scripture and the original example given was for the female children that were left alive when the rest if their nation had just been killed. They were given 30 days to mourn the loss of their loved ones and at the end of the 30 days the child would be given to the wife as her helper who would be equal in right to any natural children. When marriage age arrived the natural daughter was part of a deal that was more business that natural affection. The man of the house who had taken care of the wives and children he has was given the option of taking the captive as his wife (for life) or taking her virginity with his finger and she was then free to marry any male from the 12 Tribes. The full passage is a little longer, the important point is that is the method used anytime captives were taken, that is also the time grief by other causes. One step up from extermination does not have instances where the grief would be higher. When Israel is brought back from the grave her memory of those she grieves for is solved by including them as part of the resurrected package rather than 'erase any memories. The NT uses sparrows to define how far salvation goes when all flesh is being considered, men are the first, they are not the last that see life in the new earth. This earth is basically a seed-bank for the beginning of the new earth. A flourish at the beginning an setting into a normal rate after that. There is no different path for anybody from Adam until the resurrection.

De:21:13:
And she shall put the raiment of her captivity from off her,
and shall remain in thine house,
and bewail her father and her mother a full month:
and after that thou shalt go in unto her,
and be her husband, and she shall be thy wife.


Ec:9:10:
Whatsoever thy hand findeth to do,
do it with thy might;
for there is no work,
nor device,
nor knowledge,
nor wisdom,
in the grave,
whither thou goest.

Ec:3:20:
All go unto one place;
all are of the dust,
and all turn to dust again.
Ec:12:7:
Then shall the dust return to the earth as it was:
and the spirit shall return unto God who gave it.


Job:14:12-17:
So man lieth down,
and riseth not:
till the heavens be no more,
they shall not awake,
nor be raised out of their sleep.
O that thou wouldest hide me in the grave,
that thou wouldest keep me secret,
until thy wrath be past,
that thou wouldest appoint me a set time,
and remember me!
If a man die,
shall he live again?
all the days of my appointed time will I wait,
till my change come.
Thou shalt call, and I will answer thee:
thou wilt have a desire to the work of thine hands.
For now thou numberest my steps:
dost thou not watch over my sin?
My transgression is sealed up in a bag,
and thou sewest up mine iniquity.

Isa:60:22:
A little one shall become a thousand,
and a small one a strong nation:
I the LORD will hasten it in his time.

I was thinking about comiting suicide many times, I'm just not happy, nothing works for me, even when I try hard - result is opposite to my goal.

I can't do this cause I believe in God. Recently I had huge fight with my parents. In 2 days (when I manage all little things) I will... leave my family home without any notice.

I'll just pack my things, not all, just some clothes, laptop, my guitar and I will leave.


I don't know what happen later. I know I can't live like this. I don't hate my parents, I just can't live with them. My believe doesn't allow to hate someone - but if I leave them for ever - this isn't the same.

Sometimes, like most of the time, parents/children only need a street between them. The never see them again thing doesn't work unless to try the across the street thing firs. The across the street thing should start off with only emergency contact in the first 30 days. Then when you see each other it will be easy to see what you have in common at that point, that level can be adjusted depending on what you want to do with what is there. If it doesn't work out you both can be guilt free about the (comfortable) distance between you.