this world has too many wicked people in it, who prey on innocents

was already written...will be a sad ending...the songs are all already written....they need to pay for their wretchedness NOW or can you not stop a death...it was his choice, but he is confused and they took advantage, just as they preyed upon his innocence before when he was a child and beyond :(



Everything is happening all at the same time...is that correct? Layered reality...why I feel something sometimes when no one is there...

My confusion reigns. Oh, well. Effed up.

Last Edited by g.r.i.t.s. on 02/28/2015 11:08 PM

I agree with u.

God will come and clean up this world, he is our only hope. God is giving the evil people time to repent, but their time is almost up.

have a passion to help...
and be guided bro.....

follow this nature...because that's who He is...This is His nature...



your soul knows this nature...

Create virtue in yourself and virtue is real.
Create virtue in your family and it will grow.

yeah, i'm with ya... planet fail

This is where you go into total bat shittery.
Animals also are wicked and prey on other innocent animals.

Self murder The Lord does not want, can you find ease of pain in some way? You are stronger than you think or you would not be here.

OP, you are contemplating a permanent solution to a temporary problem, and if you go through with this, you will not have accomplished a damn thing except to give up and surrender. The pain you feel is caused by your love for others - but ending your life only hurts those you love and is possibly one of the most selfish things you can do. You can use that love to help others instead of using that pain to justify suicide. Make the right choice and choose to persevere so that you can help those you love.



Last Edited by Rising Son on 03/01/2015 12:39 AM

I don't know what is in mans nature that what others not to live, Jonah the Prophet was that way, got him in trouble. So, don't think to want the end before it is time.

You are being saved from being with a dipshit who would make your life worse. This is a blessing not a curse.

Perspective changes required for new progress.

It's in the bag...

[link to quod.lib.umich.edu]

That was good, you do that some more and you will feel better, let it all hang out, been locked up to long it festers and becomes scabs which hides the sore.

I agree.. idk why I am posting but I got to. I went all year with a van that was leaking oil from a timing belt cutting into the oil pump ..been there got it fix an boom again. So I went all year..moved states..with the move life got better ..taxes just rolled in lets get a new van ..2900 trade the other in too drop price.. 3300..2 weeks to the day motor blows ..no laws for this in the new state. Junked it for 700 and got A 1,000 dollar junker that runs for now..

lets start with the sinful Jamaicans they need to go first

Yes, this is what everyone is telling me. That to make him happy just give him a beer and can of bottled air to inhale and that he will never change. It is so sad to see potential go to waste though...I really could have helped him....network him a job, etc. once he was stable on medication.
My one male friend who is also bipolar 1, like my former bf, yet medically compliant told me that I deserve someone better, but I know he could be that man if he worked toward it.

He pushed me down to the floor once and my head hit the wall in a kinda snap back position, I had to go to the ER about it while he was in the hospital getting back on medicine. I was rxed some muscle relaxers...I never told him he hurt my neck bc I didn't want him to feel badly bc he was in a msnic psychotic state. I cld press charges still, but that is not the help he needs.
Just recently he slapped me really hard on the left side of my face which left a bruisr, which I took a picture of along with other bruises which developed after the police came and took their own pictures of marks on me. Now this time he also had marks bc I protected myself and very much so bc he had also done a bit of the pinning me down with his body as he had done in the prior instance. He actually called the cops, lied and said I hit him first. The coos said they couldn't say what happened and their stance was they didn't know since we both had marks and they weren't going to charge either if us. They did say though that it was obvious he needed medication though, so he went to the hospital. He called and told me he wanted to come home and was sorry. We both apologized to one another, but I said I wasn't going to let him come home until he admitted he hit me first. I recorded that. I paid 50 dollars for him to get a cab ride home in a snowstorm after a physical fight he started with me.

Now.

All of this transpired while he was off his medication or on medication which wasn't working. So, it's not the him that could be the normal him iv he became medically complaint.

I truly love him, but everyone is telling me to tally up everything he cost me. I was kicked out of an apartment complex bc of him, but I am happy to be buying a house. Real happy my friend found a cleaning person for me.

They also point to how all these things are drama and stress which makes the lyme worse. I cannot argue with that, but being off abx has also made it worse.

He accused me of attacking him with a DARPA microwave military weapon....I was driving my car when this supposed attack occurred. I have a recording of him making this statement, as well. He told the cops this (another trip to the hospital) and one of the cops made a statement that he should be charged just for dating me. I guess an out of his league type comment that really wasn't something to say in earshot of someone who is in a fragile psychological state of mind....just fed insecurities and self-esteem issues.

I think sleep meds are finally wirking.

thanks everyone for your kindness. GLPers ROCK!!!

g.r.i.t.s Please don't go down that dead end road. Somethings just take care of themselves. You are meant for much more.
i believe you are a magnet. and yeap..It gets overwhelming at times as you don't always attract what's golden.But you will.
Stick around another month or year... Oh hell, 5 years. i feel you are hear to be a guardian. There will be a child and that child will be important.i think you will save her life!

Idk maybe you have a point. It's just that since both my parents passed away way too young and bc of the big age gap between me and my sibs, they have their own families of which I am not a part?...we live spread out but my brother is like a father to me and my oldest sister like a mom...even when I was growing up....it's just physical distance makes it hard, but my brother and I talk every day.

so yes I live the but they hv their own families and really wldnt miss me much....they are really busy.

So I was loving my former bf......but, he apparently doesn't want my love anymore.

Perhaps if I was in a lyme free condition and I was volunteering I might feel like I'm doing something beneficial. I just cannot stand this fatigue.

Maybe I'll learn to play gee-tar on this $750 on sale for a bit over $500 Taylor guitar that I bought him for his birthday. All sales final and he left it bc he didn't feel right taking it this is how quickly he is cycling....we bought the guitar and the that night he decides he has to leave immediately to go to chi-town to become a hare krishna devotee. So, he left.

So....like I said maybe I'll learn to play take a few voice lessons, write songs about how he broke my heart like someone else did too and get fabulously rich. I can write songs.

Maybe that's a plan, lol. You have me thinking. Thanks very much.

You are a wonderful person!!!

All of you are!!!!!!!

Interesting. He kept telling me I was going to have a daughter.

I'd like to have two or three, but if that truly is his son then I was counting him as the third child bc I was going to get him primary custody....if he worked with me to get his life in order.

Anyway, I need to stop writing about him, since he is now an ex, but I can say thid....I don't want to wait 5 years or even one year.

I would definitely save a child's life, an adult too. I know car and first aid and keep my car card in my wallet. I have revived animals with cpr, but never a human.

Thank you for your kind words and care.

Last Edited by g.r.i.t.s. on 03/01/2015 02:06 AM

Oh wow, vehicle woes are really rotten. Happy you have a working car now.

It´s not worth it to end up that bitter about how things are in the world. You should be happy with your own humble little contribution to the betterment of this place.

Whoever karma pinned thus thread, thank you very much...most kind of you!

very true.but god,s way is to annihilate everything when punishment comes.the reward and punishment for your deeds is in next world

Be very carefrul where you place your bet Grits... i think you deserve a better guy. A man who hits a woman is not a man. Disentangle yourself from feeling pity for him.

Why? All of the answers are right there in the good book.

You know, the one that libtards love to misrepresent and attack, but then quote from, when it suits their purposes.

Sucks how we have to share this world with evil people. They should all be put on a planet of their own.

Problem is people aren't living G-dly moral lives.

Agree, G-d gave us a head start that is definite.

Sorry Op, your beautiful emphatic personality is a magnet for psychopaths.
It's time for you to celebrate, your evil x-bf failed - could not brake you and run for an easier victim.

You're gaslighted - "I believe i met my soul mate and screwed it up. But, I could be wrong about everything." Yes you are.
"But, more than that I am tired of the lying, deceiving, manipulation, vindictiveness, using, abusing, nasty, impolite, immorality,
predatory, evilness I come across." - are you sure this was the soul mate of your dreams?
He was controlling as well - "my two male friends that he hated me having"

Best wishes sweetheart to get over this nightmare and don't be fooled next time.

Conceivable.

Evil is trying to make a last hurrah, but it is in its death throes.