Thank you and goodbye. Suggestions, prayers, thoughts and help greatly needed.

condolences

just take the job..they will provide you with everything

this is no 15th century..govt provides uniforms,weapons,safety gears,food and training

you might even make some good friends

and yes,tell us when russia gets in war with USA

Here is an update for all you kindhearted people. I just got back home after being on my feet since seven in the morning. Got the hospital papers, spent a good deal in the morgue arguing about the most frugal burial. Trying to explain them the rules and all. They don't seem to understand the term "social burial" and wanted tons of extra body handling and pampering options, that I should pay for.

Managed to get it and the price to a bare minimum. I still have to go to a churchyard tomorrow to agree on the price of digging a grave as well as transportation. It's all quite complicated. This is my primary focus. The Will people would come later as there's a six month time period for it all.

Luckily there is a bit of funds I might be entitled to from the Social Services, as I found out today. They sure don't like to advertise it. Will take a while and two tons of paperwork to apply for of course. I will do it! Even with the current developing toothache and depression I got.


Would be wonderful to fill the current void with someone around here I could spend New Year with. Watch the fireworks bloom up around Moscow as the clock strikes twelve. Go skating in Europe's largest skating ring at VDNKh (they renamed that venue Soviet-Style) If I get the burial done I would have all holidays ahead of me to ponder my future course of action and get some relaxation in hopefully. Get my mind off things.

Good morning everyone.

I had a lousy sleep again, third night in the row. Don't think this is very healthy for me. Today I will be getting Grandmother's death certificate. Bring Granny's burial clothes to the morgue for dress-up. T

he morgue personnel look and act very shady and I don't have much pleasure in talking with them. They won't even name themselves. Sigh, burials are a huge business here. With all the corruption and negative sides that brings.

Then since I got five thousand rubles from the church society I could finally pay down the morgue services and the most basic casket service. I still have to arrange some transport tot he burial site, as well as find a place to bury her :(

Since I have some time off before everything opens now, I decided to upload a video I made 23rd of December of a nice snowfall we got. It's a little humble gift from me to all of you for your kindness!

Good morning everyone.

I had a lousy sleep again, third night in the row. Don't think this is very healthy for me. Today I will be getting Grandmother's death certificate. Bring Granny's burial clothes to the morgue for dress-up. T

he morgue personnel look and act very shady and I don't have much pleasure in talking with them. They won't even name themselves. Sigh, burials are a huge business here. With all the corruption and negative sides that brings.

Then since I got five thousand rubles from the church society I could finally pay down the morgue services and the most basic casket service. I still have to arrange some transport tot he burial site, as well as find a place to bury her :(

Since I have some time off before everything opens now, I decided to upload a video I made 23rd of December of a nice snowfall we got. It's a little humble gift from me to all of you for your kindness!

Good morning everyone.

I had a lousy sleep again, third night in the row. Don't think this is very healthy for me. Today I will be getting Grandmother's death certificate. Bring Granny's burial clothes to the morgue for dress-up. T

he morgue personnel look and act very shady and I don't have much pleasure in talking with them. They won't even name themselves. Sigh, burials are a huge business here. With all the corruption and negative sides that brings.

Then since I got five thousand rubles from the church society I could finally pay down the morgue services and the most basic casket service. I still have to arrange some transport tot he burial site, as well as find a place to bury her :(

Since I have some time off before everything opens now, I decided to upload a video I made 23rd of December of a nice snowfall we got. It's a little humble gift from me to all of you for your kindness!

Hello Russian friend. Please read Anestasia, the Russian nature goddess story, from Tiaga wilderness. Read about the singing cedar trees. Your area is spirituality advanced, and you can heal from your trauma via nature and love from those who understand, and from your guardian angels. Think of good times with your grandmother. I'm part Ukrainian, and I identify with my Northern ancestors. You are in my prayers, and I'll be right back with a link.

Hello again.Though you are exhausted you 'feel' more centered to me and that is good.Your Grandmother is very much around you and I hope thru your grief and stress you have been able to sense her. Ask her to come to your for guidance in your dream state-I feel there is much she has to communicate to you.

I agree wholeheartedly about seeking out and reading the Anastasia RINGING CEDERS books if you haven't done so previously -also perhaps check into, as a member suggested previously the communities that have been developed around Russia based on the lifestyle written of in the series. This IS the way of the NEW EARTH and it is beginning to grow more and more with the aware and enlightened.As the old worn destructive service to self paradigm breaks down more and more,and those of the lower frequencies are forced out because they don't have the resonance, this NEW EARTH WAY,NOT, nwo will become a spiritual tsunami around the planet and you are at the EPICENTRE there. That most likely is not an accident since it feels you are a very deep feeling individual. Again BLESSINGS and a JOYOUS and ABUNDANT NEW YEAR.

I feel your Grandmother wants you to dance, I don't mean professionally-I don't think. Does this fit at all?

I'm sorry to hear of your troubles OP.

Cremation is a heck of a lot cheaper than burials. Good luck to you, I'll say a prayer for you.

Good morning everybody. I had a lousy sleep once more. Again, am so grateful for all your various suggestions. Doing this burial may be sad, but at least it's helping me keep myself occupied. It's soon New Year and I feel so alone though :( Probably would unravel afterwards.

Today is also the burial and church service date. Seems the kind people in church would help with a little grave place, a cross and the hearse. Which is good. I am not sure how appropriate that is, but afterwards I wish to go to Moscow in the evening and finally film the New Year's fireworks as I've desired to do for years.

One final thing to do, while I'm still able to do it :( It won't be the same without anyone here by my side though. So feel free to visit, we've got lots of snow and I'd really like some company!

Good morning everybody. I had a lousy sleep once more. Again, am so grateful for all your various suggestions. Doing this burial may be sad, but at least it's helping me keep myself occupied. It's soon New Year and I feel so alone though :( Probably would unravel afterwards.

Today is also the burial and church service date. Seems the kind people in church would help with a little grave place, a cross and the hearse. Which is good. I am not sure how appropriate that is, but afterwards I wish to go to Moscow in the evening and finally film the New Year's fireworks as I've desired to do for years.

One final thing to do, while I'm still able to do it :( It won't be the same without anyone here by my side though. So feel free to visit, we've got lots of snow and I'd really like some company!

I am so sorry you are going through all this.
I think it is good for you to do things for yourself, like filming fireworks. It sounds like you have dedicated these past years to the care of your grandmother. It is ok, to embrace the simple opportunities like getting out for a walk when you want, breathing fresh air and expanding in the possibilities of a new way of living.

I know its probably sad/scary and hard right now ~ I will keep you in my prayers.

Good morning everyone.

I had a lousy sleep again, third night in the row. Don't think this is very healthy for me. Today I will be getting Grandmother's death certificate. Bring Granny's burial clothes to the morgue for dress-up. T

he morgue personnel look and act very shady and I don't have much pleasure in talking with them. They won't even name themselves. Sigh, burials are a huge business here. With all the corruption and negative sides that brings.

Then since I got five thousand rubles from the church society I could finally pay down the morgue services and the most basic casket service. I still have to arrange some transport tot he burial site, as well as find a place to bury her :(

Since I have some time off before everything opens now, I decided to upload a video I made 23rd of December of a nice snowfall we got. It's a little humble gift from me to all of you for your kindness!

Here are a few images from the burial. The embedded image isn't approved yet.

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How you holding up?