Pastor eaten by crocodiles while trying to walk on water like Jesus

maybe try it on water that is not occupied by godzillas

there is your prophet
only sobek makes you jesus
if you try to be jesus without his blessing
"take em to the alligator pit"
X

:epiclol

So sad. He was probably indoctrinated to believe he could do that by American missionaries.
If you have enough faith, you can move mountains, except that you still can't. Sad.

Well it does say that if you are a true believer you can drink snake venom/any deadly poison/venom and not get hurt. maybe he thought crocodiles would not hurt him also.

Fuck him
Walking on water is a metaphor for the anointed oil that floats on water

Canabis oil of course not peanut oil

Fucking uneducated Moron

I just felt the earth get lighter
We lost a moron

Dooooooooom

badass

lol that's pretty funny.

"Walking on water" is about the sun...as are all of Jesus's anthropomorphisms.

Crocodile river? Don't tempt the lord.

Is this what it means to have faith?

I think the this kind of faith is insane.

Nope Jesus did walk on water. Thinking something in your head does not make it so. Please include your references next time if it's not made up in your head. Thanks.

Not so nice.

There's a difference between faith and presumption.

Like when the devil tempted Jesus to throw Himself off of the high point of the temple.... in Matthew 4 [link to www.biblegateway.com (secure)]
Jesus didn't 'fall for it'.

HAHAHAHA stupid pastor walking on waters ment for jesus

Wrong.

Lol

Heck even the eye witnesses who actually saw Jesus walk on water weren't impressed by it.

Jesus walking on water ain't what most think it is.

Of course it would just happen to be three crocodiles.

Perfect example of a bellend

An IQ of 73 combined with a distorted religious belief system is going to have bad consequences like this.

HA HA! Idols only disappoint.

jesus the idol false greek god

2 And straightway Jesus constrained his disciples to get into a ship, and to go before him unto the other side, while he sent the multitudes away.

23 And when he had sent the multitudes away, he went up into a mountain apart to pray: and when the evening was come, he was there alone.

24 But the ship was now in the midst of the sea, tossed with waves: for the wind was contrary.

25 And in the fourth watch of the night Jesus went unto them, walking on the sea.

26 And when the disciples saw him walking on the sea, they were troubled, saying, It is a spirit; and they cried out for fear.

27 But straightway Jesus spake unto them, saying, Be of good cheer; it is I; be not afraid.

28 And Peter answered him and said, Lord, if it be thou, bid me come unto thee on the water.

29 And he said, Come. And when Peter was come down out of the ship, he walked on the water, to go to Jesus.

30 But when he saw the wind boisterous, he was afraid; and beginning to sink, he cried, saying, Lord, save me.

31 And immediately Jesus stretched forth his hand, and caught him, and said unto him, O thou of little faith, wherefore didst thou doubt?

:GrumpyGood81:

I love how he didn't think to try it on non-crocodile-infested waters first.

Am I the only one laughing my ass off here????

“We still don’t understand how this happened because he fasted and prayed the whole week.”

lolol

Crocodiles obviously don't read the bible.