Hawaii vacation do's/do not's please!

Don't go on the trip, Do give me you plane tickets!

Take a snorkel trip with Trilogy tours on Maui, first rate. I'd not take the Molokini one though, it can be a bit too choppy for some people's stomachs, the others will all be more sheltered locales.

Have a beer down at the docks in Lahaina on Maui.

Go see the sunrise at Haleakala crater. IF they still have the "bike ride" down the mountain it's fun and you only really pedal for 200 yards, that's how downhill it is.

The Pearl Harbor tour on Oahu is excellent.

I found Waikiki to be sort of the tackiest part of the whole state...

Dress casual, try the POG juice, hang loose and enjoy.

Don't take any lava off the islands. It is considered to be bad luck.

Eat all the fresh fish and fruit you can and the local drinks! Have a great time!

Don't pack too many clothes.

I spent a week in Maui, and I really enjoyed it. It takes one full day (8 hours) to go around the east side of the island. There is nice scenery, but the roads are extremely narrow and windy and 1-lane at some point. If you get car sick easily, then I would avoid doing this. Going up to the volcano takes half a day, and I think is a bit more interesting. I think they filmed Mars scenes from the original Total Recall up there.

It takes about half a day (round trip) to go from the middle part of the island to the western half. I think my problem was that everywhere looks a lot shorter distance on a map than it takes to get there. Plus you can see the majority of the island from any point on the island, so you don' think it will take long to get there, but when you add up traffic and road conditions, it will take a lot longer than you think.

Preetend you're in a foreign country and respect & enjoy the local culture.

Yes you're in the USA but it is a completely different pace there.

Have fun!

"The Road to Hana" takes a full day and isn't, in my opinion, worth it. 90% of the people I know who've done it say they'd never do it again, ate up too much time they could have used having more fun doing other things.

I did too and it was wonderful! There was not a problem at all on the Hana Hwy (eastern flank) back then but they just got partially hit by a tropical storm and heard part of the road washed out.

There is also a pineapple winery that was really nice. Can't remember where at this time but should be easy enough to search.

I have no "don'ts" for ya OP. We did make it a point to check out the Grand Wailea resort and it was my favorite at that time after driving around the whole island.

Stopped to watch surfers on the north shore.

Haleakala is awesome too. Didn't do the bike ride though but saw the sunrise. Be forewarned, it is about zero degrees at the top of the mountain, pre-dawn.

Maui:

Halekala Crater an hour before sunrise. Bring warm clothes, it's real fucking cold (like in the 30's) but worth it.

Dinner at Mama's Fish House.

Half to full day in Paia for shopping, and since you will be close by, go check out the surf at Jaws.

Hana. I liked it, but was there for 3 weeks, so not a waste of time for me.

Oahu:
Didn't care for anything there, may snorkeling at Diamond Head, and surf at Pipeline, but other than that, it's a crowded island with a shitload of traffic

Watch out for the Menehuna spirits, if you encounter any in a remote area, avert your eyes and let them pass.

Go here and have an awesome dinner!
[link to longhis.com]

Trust me, I have been there many times and it's the best!

Go see the Arizona memorial at Pearl harbor on Oahu.

Have a great time!

It depends on what you like and what floats your boat so to speak. One of the things which I didn't see mentioned was turtle watching. While on Maui, you can go to black sand beach and you will usually see fairly large sea turtles which come out of the water and will lay on the beach for hours. They can almost seem dead, but they aren't. Do not touch them. I think the rule in Hawaii is you need to stay at least 20' away. A couple of years ago, I saw a young punk sit on a turtle laying on the beach. He was asked several times to get off the turtle and respect the distance. He refused. It wasn't a minute passed and these large hawaiians came out of nowhere and started beating on him. They turned him into a bloody pulp and they still called the police on him.

There is also the rain forest in Maui. It will take you a good 2-3 hrs to cruise it depending on traffic and the time of day. If you stop, it will take you longer.

Like one person recommended, cruise the east end of the island.

I cannot say that I like the center of Maui, it is nothing but a bunch of country clubs, golfing, resorts etc. Some people go there just for that reason, nothing wrong with that.

On Oahu, depending on where you are at, if you are cruising H1, you could visualize yourself on an interstate around LA. Waikiki at night, hell, even in the day is nothing but a tourist trap. There are some interesting things to see on the street at night.

Go walk around diamond head. Go have lunch at the Mandarin. Just don't stay there unless you have money to burn or want your picture on one of their walls. In that area, you will find some of the most expensive real estate in the world. It's a nice area, but difficult to stay at that part of the island if you have to go into Honolulu or Waikiki.

Speaking of which, the morning traffic going into Honolulu could take you two hours to get there. I like Ko Olina Point, but do not stay there for that reason. However, you should allocate one morning to eat breakfast at the Marriott there. Best breakfast on all the islands, bar none, a little pricey at $30/person but worth it. Or you could have an Asian style breakfast at the Hawaiian Prince, will cost about the same. The marina you will probably recognize if you go there, it hasn't changed munch since 1964 when they filmed the SS Minnow leaving for Gilligan's island.

Go to the North Shore. You won't see big waves this time of year unless there is a storm. Go to the Polynesian Cultural Center or the Temple of the Bells. Or take H2 to the north shore and turn left right before you get there and either go ride a horse or jump out of a plane.

If you are looking for solitude you could stay at the old Hilton which is now the Turtle Bay Resort. That is where Forgetting Sarah Marshall was filmed. But if you need access to Honolulu, it will take you awhile to get there.

Lastly, depending on how much time you have, you should take the day ferry to Lanai and rent a four wheel drive jeep. Cruise to the top of the mountain or go to the garden of the gods.

When you pick up your rental car, make sure that you take the magazine with the map. You will probably want a navigation system and not solely rely on your phone gps.

Be careful on ledges, more than one person has fell off and died. That's how the guy that wrote Animal House died in 1980. All of the sandwich islands are volcanic and not stable.

Enjoy

Hawaii

don't

im a local there come to the swap meet in kahului maui and buy something from me......wink wink. from there i will tell you all the right places to go local style and those to avoid- aka tourist traps.

And don't take any coral either. Respect Hawaiian cultural sites and don't move the rocks. If you see a sign that says KAPU, it means forbidden.

Waikiki is crowded but swimming on the beach with diamond head view is iconic! Do a late afternoon sunset cocktail hour ( or 2) at the Top of the I ( top of Ilikai hotel) and then have a leisurely dinner. Watching the coast of Oahu go from sunset to evening is fantastic.

Spend an afternoon at Sea Life Psrk over Waimanalo - truly fabulous views. Swim with the Rays. The beaches at waimanalo are gorgeous

Buy fresh flower leis when you arrive and again every day- visit the lei stands near the airport where the locals go, or get leis in Chinatown

Visit the northern shore - fantastic beaches. The Polynesian cultural center is good for tourists- very fun

Make reservations for dinner at one of the bona fide Japanese tea houses up in the mountains of Oahu... Eat at The Willows in Waikiki - been famous a long time.

Last Edited by Dodger007 on 07/29/2016 09:27 PM

Your thinking of Night Marchers, not Menehune.



[link to youtube.com (secure)]

I'll add a recommendation for Longhi's, fantastic place for a dinner.

on oahu avoid waikiki, spend time on the north shore, also make sure you go to waimanalo bay on the east side, NOT waimanalo beach park.

They are very close to each other, the beach park is full of bums and meth heads, the bay is just the longest beach on oahu, soft fine grain sand, and the waves are usually mellow.

Also check out the Pali lookout, easy drive up attraction, and the wind intensity is awesome.

Go to Leilani's and have a slice of Hula Pie.

[link to www.leilanis.com]

Lavender Farm in the upcountry.

The road to Hana is a beating, but very pretty- just takes all day.

Snorkeling.

Just wander around and enjoy the culture, there are some really neat places off the beaten path. It is amazing. Also remember you aren't on the mainland.

On Maui hit up Ululani's Shave Ice

ono!

[link to www.ululanisshaveice.com]

Flower on the left side behind ear means taken, right means available- Just like a wedding ring. (Don't send yer woman out with one behind the right! and don't go talking to some big ol' Samoans squeeze on accident!)

Also, the Aloha thing is for real- show some "Aloha" and people will respond much better to your howlie (white person) ass- And, that aloha stops after 11:00pm. Hawaiians like to scrap. If you drink after 11:00 where locals congregate, get ready to throw-down (seldom weapons- only fists and stuff... but they love that shit- best off to avoid!)

DO NOT TAKE A PIECE OF LAVA HOME, VERY UNCOOL, BAD JUJU.

SUNSET BEACH AND KAENA POINT IS THE BEST BODY SURFING ON OAHU BUT THE RIPTIDES ARE VERY DANGEROUS. IT'S FAR ENOUGH OUT THAT ALMOST NO ONE GOES THERE. DO NOT LEAVE VALUABLES IN YOUR CAR, THEY WILL GET STOLEN.

SHRIMP TRUCKS ON THE NORTH SHORE ARE A MUST. DITTO PLATE LUNCHES.

DON'T TRY AND COP WEED ON THE BEACHES LIKE A DUMBASS. THE MAUI WOWIE IS ONE HIT SHIT, DO NOT TRY AND SMOKE A WHOLE JOINT OR YOU WILL REGRET IT.

SEA WORLD IS FOR TOURISTS, DITTO HAWAIIAN VILLAGE LUAU.

THE BEST PUPUS (LATE NIGHT SNACKS) ARE AT CHART HOUSE OVERLOOKING THE MARINA IN WAIKIKI. TRY THE AHI POKE AND THE BLACKENED AHI.

TRY NOT TO PRETEND YOU AREN'T A TOURIST.

GO WATCH THE SURFERS AT WAIMANALO BUT BE SUPER CAREFUL OF THE SHORE BREAKS IF YOU DO GO IN.

HUNAMA BAY IS KIND OF TOURISTY, BUT IF YOU GO REALLY EARLY IT IS THE BEST SNORKELING ON THE ISLAND.

KAILUA BEACH IS GREAT FOR JUST RELAXING. FAMILY FRIENDLY.

AVOID SHOPPING ANYWHERE IN WAIKIKI, IT'S LIKE DOWNTOWN TOKYO ONLY MORE JAPANESE.

IF YOU JUST WANT TO LOOK AT MASSIVE WAVES, MAKAHA IS MESMERIZING.

IF YOU ARE WHITE THERE IS NOT ENOUGH SUNSCREEN ON EARTH TO PROTECT YOU FROM A SUNBURN. DO NOT BE STUPID AND HIT BEECHES DURING THE 11AM-4PM TIME FRAME OR YOU WILL REGRET IT.

BRING TWICE AS MUCH MONEY AS YOU THINK YOU WILL SPEND AND BE PREPARED TO SPEND IT ALL. EVERYTHING IS MORE EXPENSIVE BY A FACTOR OF 2-3X.

ENJOY YOURSELF.

Tru dat! Hawaiians like scrap

Visit Oahu's north shore and pearl Harbor u can pretty much see everything in one day and seriously DO NOT TAKE ANYTHING OF VALUE TO THE BEACH! Fucking meth heads be jacking mofos. Remember the locals do not like us howlys.

Mahalo means trash can it's on all the trash cans

^^^^ THIS ^^^^

I was a bouncer at "Lulu's" on the Big Island- we ran 9 bouncers including some guys from Dog The Bounty Hunter (Uncle Sonny Westbrook was the Chief). I was the only howlie- Some nights of island warfare... lemmitellya.

You have to go to an ABC store.. they are really hard to find though... lol