Help! Can I qualify for "stimulus" funding?

When LPs and 45s came out, I bought up all the 78s I could find thinking I would corner the market of those who would refuse to give up their old phonographs.
When Ford discontinued the Edsel, I bought up all the Edsel cars and parts I could find, thinking I would be the exclusive provider to the collector market.
8-tracks arrive, and I corner the market on LPs (especially 4-channel LPs)and 45s knowing vinyl will never die.
When cassettes arrived, I then purchased all the 8-tracks and 8-track players available, assured EVERYONE would not make the switch.
When CDs and DVDs came on the scene, I bought an entire warehouse of beta and vhs movies to sell on Ebay.
I am thinking of buying up all the analog televisions left over after the digital switchover, to sell to countries like Mexico and Canada...making MILLIONS.
Does anyone know where I can apply for "stimulus funding" for this business venture?