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What's your earliest traumatic memory?

 
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 76099143
United States
06/15/2022 12:49 PM
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Re: What's your earliest traumatic memory?
Accidental poisoning (gopher poison) around the age of 3, which was near death, and I had an out of body experience, and I didn't want to go back into my body.

Rattlesnake bite around the age of 4, and my leg swelled up horribly. That experience gave me nightmares throughout my childhood until the age of 16 when I confronted my fears and killed a rattlesnake and made a necklace with it's rattles.

The near death experience set me on a path to try and figure out what I'm doing in this reality, and after 60 years of practical research, energy seeing, healing arts, past life meditations and research which includes shared memories with many people, I haven't discovered an answer as to why I create lives in this reality, and not just on this planet.

hf
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 76099143


John?
 Quoting: uhhuh


Nope.
Anonymous Coward
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06/15/2022 01:00 PM
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Re: What's your earliest traumatic memory?
Accidental poisoning (gopher poison) around the age of 3, which was near death, and I had an out of body experience, and I didn't want to go back into my body.

Rattlesnake bite around the age of 4, and my leg swelled up horribly. That experience gave me nightmares throughout my childhood until the age of 16 when I confronted my fears and killed a rattlesnake and made a necklace with it's rattles.

The near death experience set me on a path to try and figure out what I'm doing in this reality, and after 60 years of practical research, energy seeing, healing arts, past life meditations and research which includes shared memories with many people, I haven't discovered an answer as to why I create lives in this reality, and not just on this planet.

hf
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 76099143


John?
 Quoting: uhhuh


Nope.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 76099143


Because of the energy & psychic research I picked up on 9/11 back in 1996, during a ready for a housemate. During that I reading I also saw NYC getting nuked by a Russian submarine right off the coast. The nuke goes off right over the Rockefeller Center.

During other readings I saw the invasion of the U.S. by the Chinese.

We're going to have civil war and natural disasters first, so it might still be a while before the Chinese invasion.

hf
hankie
Everything

User ID: 80628258
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06/15/2022 01:16 PM

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Re: What's your earliest traumatic memory?
I had the same recurring nightmare from as far as I can remember until age 5 or 6. Every single night the same fucking nightmare about 3 demonic witches with long teeth hovering above the floor chasing me down the hallway and up the stairs, a sort of like "the Shining" type of deal. I was unable to scream for help (mute) and when I reached the attic of my house, the caught me and then nightmare ended just before they could kill me. EVERY SINGLE NIGHT. YEARS on end in the most important years of a child's life.

Then my miserably incompetent parents at the same time got so desperate to get me to go to sleep (so they could fuck and watch TV unhindered) when I was mortified to fall asleep, constantly getting back up and going back down the stairs crying. They never asked me what was wrong, they just started abusing me immediately.
My fucking autistic piece of shit father had no better idea than repeatedly dragging me down the cellar stairs by my hair to physically abuse me there in the dark, beating me, pulling my hair, ears, shaking me to kingdom come ... If it wasn't the cellar, then he pulled me up the stairs to the attic to abuse some more over there or just lock me up in it.

One day, the nightmares just stopped. I can even crystal clearly remember what the end "scene" was, how the witches looked different and everything.

I've been bullied all my life, ruthlessly, relentlessly, from primary school up until the 4th year of High School because of multiple reasons. My grandfather was a big wig politician and I had hair that was as blonde as straw.

Nobody of the staff gave a flying fuck, neither did my parents really because I didn't really mean anything to them. (I still don't and I'm still being used as a sort of house slave to do the shit they don't feel like doing or are to fat and old to do.)
It was pure terror. All I got was to hope the day would end quickly and then I could only do homework. We never travelled, even had family days out, I wasn't allowed any pets etc. etc.

I finished high school top of my year and then in the second year of university had a mental breakdown, a morbidly suicidal depression with subsequent attempts. I can't say I ever recovered. I'm a fucking mess. A kind hearted person with nothing but the will to please, but completely rejected by anything and everything, suffering from PTSD that gets me into trouble every time a sick fuck or cunt has found someone to victimize in me. I swear to Christ, it's like the devil and all of his demons are after me non-stop. No matter how hard I pray, ask for forgiveness, try my absolute best to get myself together in the best manner fully committed to all I do, I fail ... I fail ... I fail and fail and trouble finds me. Then my fucking lid flips off and I become a raging beast, like a cornered animal trying to defend itself for dear life.

I'm scared shitless right now for things that happened these past two days to me. It's insane what I went through without provoking anyone and just being forced into defending myself.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 78036093


If possible, do this, learn to ignore these types because if they see an opening they will continue because that is their problem, not you. Ignore them enough they may quite mess with you, remember anyone that does this is not worth the time of day. God Bless and keep you. They sound like abusive personalities, bullies.
Sorry I got a headache

These are the times that tries men's and
women's souls!

May we come though it victorious!
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 80376576
United States
06/15/2022 01:17 PM
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Re: What's your earliest traumatic memory?
I was 3. Had an ear tag. I remember being held down on the hospital bed, lime green walls, and the med team shoving a black mask over my face to put me out.

They say mental illness is spawned from trauma.
 Quoting: uhhuh


I've written my own book of my lifetime of trauma. One after the other.
DelusionsOfGranduer

User ID: 80365469
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06/15/2022 01:21 PM

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Re: What's your earliest traumatic memory?
My mother had undiagnosed scitzo and bipolar. I was 3 and my Dad took my brother to a soccer game and I was left alone with my mom. I did something to upset her, not sure what I did, probably typical toddler stuff. She got really mad and picked me up by my ears and held me me up in the air that way saying she was going to kill me. It hurt really bad, it felt like my head was going to explode.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 52947238
Canada
06/15/2022 01:23 PM
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Re: What's your earliest traumatic memory?
Watching my Mother stab a man to death that tried to rape her.
1guynAz

User ID: 2229693
United States
06/15/2022 01:23 PM

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Re: What's your earliest traumatic memory?
All of them...whatever they are...are traumatic.

You know why? Because---CHILDREN DON'T KNOW NOTHING!

So they get traumatized, THEN parents explain why

they got 'called out' for not doing the right thing.

It's all traumatic. Then you start gaining a sense of

understanding how to deal with your failures as a growing

human being in this world.

But definitely they don't "define me" and what my

character is...
Living has taught me one thing; nothing is certain...except salvation through Jesus Christ!
Anonymous Coward
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06/15/2022 01:24 PM
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Re: What's your earliest traumatic memory?
8 years old stuck a peanut up my nose had to go to ER
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 83645773
United States
06/15/2022 01:24 PM
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Re: What's your earliest traumatic memory?
My first poo that dropped and did a backsplash onto my butt cheeks. (public restroom) I was 4.
Anonymous Coward
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South Africa
06/15/2022 01:27 PM
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Re: What's your earliest traumatic memory?
Accidental poisoning (gopher poison) around the age of 3, which was near death, and I had an out of body experience, and I didn't want to go back into my body.

Rattlesnake bite around the age of 4, and my leg swelled up horribly. That experience gave me nightmares throughout my childhood until the age of 16 when I confronted my fears and killed a rattlesnake and made a necklace with it's rattles.

The near death experience set me on a path to try and figure out what I'm doing in this reality, and after 60 years of practical research, energy seeing, healing arts, past life meditations and research which includes shared memories with many people, I haven't discovered an answer as to why I create lives in this reality, and not just on this planet.

hf
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 76099143


John?
 Quoting: uhhuh


Nope.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 76099143


Because of the energy & psychic research I picked up on 9/11 back in 1996, during a ready for a housemate. During that I reading I also saw NYC getting nuked by a Russian submarine right off the coast. The nuke goes off right over the Rockefeller Center.

During other readings I saw the invasion of the U.S. by the Chinese.

We're going to have civil war and natural disasters first, so it might still be a while before the Chinese invasion.

hf
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 76099143


I had a dream many years ago, in an American setting. I live on the other side of the world btw, in Africa. I guess it was Arizona or somewhere similar, from the natural surroundings. It was desert land, reddish sand, mesas. Me and a small group of people were there, then we had to get out of there because "the Chinese are coming". In the next scene i saw a large number of Chinese soldiers marching across what looked like a mini mountain pass,towards this area. A high winding road winding along a hill or such. I never forgot that dream for some reason.
18328

User ID: 83126626
United States
06/15/2022 01:30 PM
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Re: What's your earliest traumatic memory?
I was 4 or 5 and stepped on a rusty 16 penny nail in the sand box. It went all the way through the top of my foot. One of my older cousins was there and pulled it out. I had to be rushed into town to the doctor for treatment and a tetanus shot. That was excruciating.
Anonymous Coward (OP)
User ID: 79546208
United States
06/15/2022 01:32 PM
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Re: What's your earliest traumatic memory?
I was 4 or 5 and stepped on a rusty 16 penny nail in the sand box. It went all the way through the top of my foot. One of my older cousins was there and pulled it out. I had to be rushed into town to the doctor for treatment and a tetanus shot. That was excruciating.
 Quoting: 18328


Jesus Christ...literally.
hankie
Everything

User ID: 80628258
United States
06/15/2022 01:32 PM

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Re: What's your earliest traumatic memory?
Accidental poisoning (gopher poison) around the age of 3, which was near death, and I had an out of body experience, and I didn't want to go back into my body.

Rattlesnake bite around the age of 4, and my leg swelled up horribly. That experience gave me nightmares throughout my childhood until the age of 16 when I confronted my fears and killed a rattlesnake and made a necklace with it's rattles.

The near death experience set me on a path to try and figure out what I'm doing in this reality, and after 60 years of practical research, energy seeing, healing arts, past life meditations and research which includes shared memories with many people, I haven't discovered an answer as to why I create lives in this reality, and not just on this planet.

hf
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 76099143


John?
 Quoting: uhhuh


Nope.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 76099143


Because of the energy & psychic research I picked up on 9/11 back in 1996, during a ready for a housemate. During that I reading I also saw NYC getting nuked by a Russian submarine right off the coast. The nuke goes off right over the Rockefeller Center.

During other readings I saw the invasion of the U.S. by the Chinese.

We're going to have civil war and natural disasters first, so it might still be a while before the Chinese invasion.

hf
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 76099143


Have you ever thought we are in a civil war but most people don't know they are in a war? When there is a group of people doing things to the opposite group of people that can end their lives then it is called a civil war except there is no civility to it. So, I hope people who are here talking about their problems work it out so they are protected from the fall out of these uncivil people.
Sorry I got a headache

These are the times that tries men's and
women's souls!

May we come though it victorious!
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 45292866
United Kingdom
06/15/2022 01:37 PM
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Re: What's your earliest traumatic memory?
When I found out Santa Claus wasn't real. I was holding a board meeting of my company, when one of the partners in my firm told me. It was the day before my 54th birthday.

I've never been the same.

And I served in nam.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 76641282
United States
06/15/2022 01:39 PM
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Re: What's your earliest traumatic memory?
Something involving Bill Cosby.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 81017665
United States
06/15/2022 01:40 PM
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Re: What's your earliest traumatic memory?
This is more like the opposite of trauma but when I was 2 or 3 my mother took me out of the shower and laid down on the floor on her back holding me above her head. Then she was doing some kind of peek-a-boo thing where she would lower me so my face was in front of her face then lift me real quick into the air.

After the first few times she did that when she lifted me in the air I let loose a stream of piss and peed in her face. I remember her going from a big smiling laughing face to a blech sound and turning her head and spitting before she moved me out of the way. I don't know if I was laughing while she was playing peek a boo but I was laughing after that.

I don't get along with my mother now so it's satisfying to have such a vivid memory of passing in her face.
Furrry Pete

User ID: 83623499
United States
06/15/2022 01:41 PM
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Re: What's your earliest traumatic memory?
Severe case of croup when I was around 3. Wound up in an oxygen tent in the hospital. Hallucinated huge spiders crawling all over the inside of the plastic. Not a big fan of spiders to this day.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 83647268


Me either. I know it was before I could talk and my mother was carrying me somewhere. She had a big black spider on her coat.

I slapped it to knock it off and she thought I just hit her out of the blue and she slapped me. I didn't take it personally though, I knew she didn't know what happened.
"It's a friendly friendly world" (Andy Kaufman)
Calm seas do not a sailor make,
Nor easy horses, a horseman.
And Jesus was a sailor when he walked upon the water And he spent a long time watching from his lonely wooden tower and when He could be certain only drowning men could see Him- Leonard Cohen
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 81017665
United States
06/15/2022 01:41 PM
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Re: What's your earliest traumatic memory?
This is more like the opposite of trauma but when I was 2 or 3 my mother took me out of the shower and laid down on the floor on her back holding me above her head. Then she was doing some kind of peek-a-boo thing where she would lower me so my face was in front of her face then lift me real quick into the air.

After the first few times she did that when she lifted me in the air I let loose a stream of piss and peed in her face. I remember her going from a big smiling laughing face to a blech sound and turning her head and spitting before she moved me out of the way. I don't know if I was laughing while she was playing peek a boo but I was laughing after that.

I don't get along with my mother now so it's satisfying to have such a vivid memory of passing pissing in her face.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 81017665


This was almost definitely younger than 3 too I'm pretty sure I couldn't walk yet.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 83667104
United States
06/15/2022 01:43 PM
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Re: What's your earliest traumatic memory?
About five years old I think,

Having oral sex performed on me by a man dressed up like a woman.

I’m sure it wasn’t Halloween. I’d remembered that.
Chuckles

User ID: 77919863
United States
06/15/2022 01:44 PM
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Re: What's your earliest traumatic memory?
Most dudes won't remember it but your circumcision was fucking brutal.

Also, its a stupid religious tradition with no purpose except funneling energy to that religion. Gross.
"Anything worth doing is worth doing badly."
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"Look at me... being all human."
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Halfbreedgal
User ID: 40089194
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06/15/2022 01:44 PM
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Re: What's your earliest traumatic memory?
My drunk step dad taking me out of the bathtub at age 3 while my mother wasn't home. He was a pedo and I remember thinking I was confused because he was pretending to care about me by giving me a bath. Any other time he was mean and nasty. My mom found out and didn't leave him...I was so scared of him growing up that I would literally hold my breath around him . Then when I ran away at age 17, my mother and him called me a delinquent to the rest of the step family. I helped my mother during his terminal illness and she treated me like dogshit. Now she will send a stupid card occasionally pretending to love me. Gimme a break. She never should have been a parent. I'm 52.
Anonymous Coward
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06/15/2022 01:45 PM
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Re: What's your earliest traumatic memory?
It depends on what you call "traumatic memories".

My first memories center around my frustration with having loaded diapers at about age 1, the squishy, oozy feeling was more than I could bear.
. I did not like this, for even a minute and I rose holy hell to have them changed. If they weren't, I just took them off an went bare unless they had put pants on me too, in which case I would stomp my legs until the poo came out of my pants legs. YEP, no bullshit, I can remember it..


I remember watching Kennedy's funeral at age 1 1/2. It stayed with me I think because of the effect I saw it having on people around me.

The "bad memory" i have that goes the furthest back was a fat much older female cousin of mine taking me into a bedroom and trying to get busy with me. I was about 2 1/2. I remember getting my head stuck in the slats of a banister around age 1. I thought I was stuck there for good.


cruise
Anonymous Coward
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United States
06/15/2022 01:45 PM
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Re: What's your earliest traumatic memory?
I remember being around 3 years old and my father calling me foul names like 'little slut'.I did not know what it meant at the time, but by his tone of voice I knew it was bad. When I found out years later what the term meant I went into a deep depression. I am 60 years old and this still makes me very sad.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 83645773
United States
06/15/2022 01:45 PM
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Re: What's your earliest traumatic memory?
Most dudes won't remember it but your circumcision was fucking brutal.

Also, its a stupid religious tradition with no purpose except funneling energy to that religion. Gross.
 Quoting: Chuckles


We don't cut peepees in this family.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 83659073
United States
06/15/2022 01:50 PM
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Re: What's your earliest traumatic memory?
My drunk step dad taking me out of the bathtub at age 3 while my mother wasn't home. He was a pedo and I remember thinking I was confused because he was pretending to care about me by giving me a bath. Any other time he was mean and nasty. My mom found out and didn't leave him...I was so scared of him growing up that I would literally hold my breath around him . Then when I ran away at age 17, my mother and him called me a delinquent to the rest of the step family. I helped my mother during his terminal illness and she treated me like dogshit. Now she will send a stupid card occasionally pretending to love me. Gimme a break. She never should have been a parent. I'm 52.
 Quoting: Halfbreedgal 40089194


Did he actually molest you, or not? Not liking a fucking step parent is pretty common
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 83659073
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06/15/2022 01:51 PM
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Re: What's your earliest traumatic memory?

Most dudes won't remember it but your circumcision was fucking brutal.

Also, its a stupid religious tradition with no purpose except funneling energy to that religion. Gross.
 Quoting: Chuckles

It is done because it traumatizes the child, intentionally.
.
Anonymous Coward
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United States
06/15/2022 01:55 PM
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Re: What's your earliest traumatic memory?
I remember being around 3 years old and my father calling me foul names like 'little slut'.I did not know what it meant at the time, but by his tone of voice I knew it was bad. When I found out years later what the term meant I went into a deep depression. I am 60 years old and this still makes me very sad.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 25099155


I think my dad invented the word "fucktard" one day when I got him so pissed off he started raving and meaning to call me a fucking retard he somehow conjoined the two words.


This was in the 60s so its hard to say if it had ever been said before then. I opened up his hand with a shovel while we were digging a ditch so I know I deserved it. I got called all kinds of shit as a kid, it bounced right off me and that quality only encouraged people to get more ugly about it.
Backwash

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06/15/2022 01:56 PM

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Re: What's your earliest traumatic memory?
My parents divorce when I was 6.
 Quoting: ScrumpTheTexan


Hate to hear that Scrump.

My kids at the time of my Divorce had been B6 and G2. Looking back a thousand times maybe I should have never left them.

The Ex was a Nut Job that passed as "Normal" willing to throw it all away for the 2nd time, For something greener across the Fence. Nightmare for me.

I still suffer over it to this day. I just never knew their

feelings over it? Guess I got a hint of it. Sad stuff
hf
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Anonymous Coward
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06/15/2022 01:57 PM
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Re: What's your earliest traumatic memory?
4 years old . someone knocked grill over and i happened to walk barefoot across a bunch of marble size and smaller chunks of hott charcoal that were missed when cleaning it up.
It all burned into my feet
Was taken to ER but ended up having to come back multiple times to have the charcoal picked out of my feet while my mother held me down.
Ill never forget that shit
Anonymous Coward (OP)
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United States
06/15/2022 02:00 PM
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Re: What's your earliest traumatic memory?
My parents divorce when I was 6.
 Quoting: ScrumpTheTexan


Hate to hear that Scrump.

My kids at the time of my Divorce had been B6 and G2. Looking back a thousand times maybe I should have never left them.

The Ex was a Nut Job that passed as "Normal" willing to throw it all away for the 2nd time, For something greener across the Fence. Nightmare for me.

I still suffer over it to this day. I just never knew their

feelings over it? Guess I got a hint of it. Sad stuff
hf
 Quoting: Backwash


To each (family) their own. As you know, some divorces are a God send. Whose to say your nutty ex would've done by now. Being a parent is hard and sometimes the lesser of two evils is as good as it gets. Hold your head up, human.





GLP