MICHIGAN’S DRUNK Attorney General Dana Nessel Left MSU v UM Game in Wheelchair. Jokes About “Vomiting” On Constituents, “Skull

Democrat AG Dana Nessel, who literally promoted her lack of a penis as a reason to vote for her in 2018, became so intoxicated at the MSU-UM game that she was removed from the stadium in a wheelchair.

[link to 100percentfedup.com (secure)]

MY OFFICIAL STATEMENT ON “TAILGATE-GATE”
[link to www.facebook.com (secure)]

My staff has pleaded with me to hire a crisis-management PR firm for an incident that occurred on 10/30 at the UM/MSU football game. Instead, I thought I would just share the events which transpired that fateful day.

Before the big game, I attended a tailgate on an empty stomach. Much to my surprise, MSU tailgate’s tend to have more alcohol than food, so I thought it seemed like a good idea to eat 2 Bloody Mary’s, since as long as you put enough vegetables in them, it’s practically a salad. As it turned out, this was not a brilliant idea. Also, I might be a terrible bartender.

I proceeded to go to the game (which I’m told Michigan definitely won!) and started to feel ill. I laid low for a while, but my friends recommended that I leave so as to prevent me from vomiting on any of my constituents(polling consistently shows “Roman showers” to be unpopular among most demographics).

I had a few folks help me up the stairs and someone grabbed a wheelchair so as to prevent me from stumbling in the parking lot. Like all smart people attending festivities where drinking occurs, I had a designated driver. I went home, fell asleep on the couch, and my wife threw some blankets on me and provided me with some water and Tylenol for what she knew would be a skull-crushing hangover the next day. (Best wife ever!)

So there. That’s the scandalous tale of the events which transpired at Tailgate-Gate. (Also at some point it seemed like a good idea to make the governor take a picture with Ron Weiser. Sorry Governor!). Just so one doesn’t have to imagine what this scene might have looked like, I’ve attached this handy photo.
[link to www.crainsdetroit.com (secure)]

[link to www.abc12.com (secure)]

[link to www.independent.co.uk (secure)]

Last Edited by PANDEMIC OF THE VACCINATED on 11/11/2021 12:32 PM