HELP !!! Our new puppy is afraid of me .. | |
FeedYourHead
User ID: 77416429 United States 09/12/2021 10:03 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | I suspect there was someone in her past that abused or frightened her...a male figure obviously. First thing I would suggest would be to NOT keep approaching her...not at all. It's clearly not working and is resulting in reinforcing her fear. I would sit or even lay down on the ground, get at HER LEVEL. This will lower her anxiety. I noticed when you feed her you are sitting (closer to her level) but in each of the moments she is showing fear it appears in the video you are 1. standing and 2. coming at her. You will need to let her come to you on HER OWN TIME SCHEDULE. When you lay down you might put some food near you, don't try to pet her or anything....again, just let her make all the moves. With what I'm seeing it could take a long time to build the trust but the way she is eating when you are seated makes it seem she just needs a little time and for things to be done at her pace....not yours. One more thing. When you are in HER backyard, (yes, it's her territory) I might suggest sometimes just being there....just doing other things. Let her simply get used to your presence without you trying to get her to like you. I can't stress enough, you have to let her make the decision when she is ready to trust. Last Edited by FeedYourHead on 09/12/2021 10:09 PM Ask Alice when she's 10ft tall This is a battle for the future of civilization. If free speech is lost even in America, tyranny is all that lies ahead. Elon Musk |
SamAdams
User ID: 80367713 United States 09/12/2021 10:19 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | Dogs often have trust issues with men. Probably something happened prior to you adopting the dog. So, just don't worry about it. In 6 mos the dog will trust you. It may not ever totally lose its skittishness. Each dog is a bit different. Some dogs are in your lap, others are just fine keeping their distance. But it will warm up to you in time. |
Friends Matter
User ID: 75525114 Canada 09/12/2021 10:20 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | LEAVE THE FUCKING DOG ALONE... JUST IGNORE IT... IT WILL EVENTUALLY COME TO YOU ON ITS TERMS... DONT TRY TO HARD... YOU KNOW SOMTHING SO EASY SOME OF YOU STUPID MORONS END UP MAKING IT SO HARD... YOUR TAKING IT PERSONAL... QUIT MAKING IT ABOUT YOU... ATTENTION SEEKING OR WHAT... PATHETIC... Friendship isn't about whom you have known the longest...Its about who walked into your life and said...I am here for you. |
Coloradical
User ID: 80793406 United States 09/12/2021 10:35 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
Doom Monkey
User ID: 6954364 United States 09/12/2021 11:50 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | I had stray that I took in with similar issues, I fed it, game him his treats but I gave him his space, he loved to chase after tennis balls but would never return them, until it occurred to me to me to try with two tennis balls. I'd throw one and he'd fetch it and then I'd start bouncing the other ball and he'd run up to get it dropping the other ball at my feet and then I'd toss the ball. It took about a month of doing that a few times a day to where two balls weren't needed anymore and he was finally comfortable enough to bring it to me. It wasn't much longer after that when he'd come and just relax at my feet. Now he's an attention hound. |
~LSDMTHC~
User ID: 80745252 United States 09/12/2021 11:53 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
guitar ace
User ID: 32655223 United States 09/13/2021 12:31 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | you have to be sitting cross legged on the floor sideways facing the pup to get any kind of chance of bonding. if that doesn't work then lay on your back to show submission. if the dog is looking at you cautiously, lick your lips , to a dog that means "i'm good", "chill out, i bring peace". i saw people say feed the dog some meat, etc. don't just feed the dog, leave a trail of individual bites leading to you while you're cross legged on the ground. let the dog sniff you and don't stare at it. once your able, rub that dog's chest, massage it like you would a human. the dog will never want you to stop. if that doesn't work, have one of your family members pet the dog until it's blissed out and then quietly and gently pet the dog too. most importantly with a dog like this, sit on the ground on your butt. even crouching will freak a dog out, it'll think you're lunging at it. Last Edited by guitar ace on 09/13/2021 12:41 AM |
retlawjones
User ID: 78819376 Canada 09/13/2021 12:50 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | Put away the camera!!! Trust me on this one. My dog who lived for 16 years was like my shadow, but the moment there was a camera in my hands, he was hiding and running away like your doggy. I used to think it was because he saw a flash from a photo and never got over it, but later I just think it was because something was pointing at him and directed at him. They are not stupid. They make up their minds about something and good luck ever changing them unless you change first. I had to stop playing my accordian because my 2 Pekingese dogs run away whenever I play it. sigh. retlawjones |
#521
User ID: 80859818 United States 09/13/2021 01:08 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
Sol-tari
User ID: 75858745 Australia 09/13/2021 02:53 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | It's fearful-avoident. Someone was a prick in the past. Props for attempting to change your appearance mate, your hearts in it. It could be your general body size, way you carry yourself, or a number of things - you've got your pups inside with no issue, so I'm guessing you've got the pack leader attitude to at least some extent. That confidence can be enough to shake a nervous dog for a bit. Or the previous owner was similar, but used the boot because he was useless. Anywho. Honest advise is time mate. He's not aggressive or any of that. Lay down outside with a big bag of jerky and a book/equivalent for yourself. Every now and then grab a bit out to nibble for yourself, and throw a piece his way . He's confident coming over for food, so the combination of you laying down (at/below his level) to reduce your threat profile, your focus being on your book (let's him relax, focus is not on him) and the incentive of food should get him. But because you're not solely eating a meal, his attention will wander as you don't touch the food source constantly. He'll relax, give you a sniff, little steps. Don't react or make a big deal about it. Edit to explain don't make a big deal - eventually you'll give him a pat as he's close and you give him some jerky for example. No big reactions or drama, just a couple of scratches and back to the book - it's a non event so to speak. The praises and noise can come at other times. Leash walks and the like can help as well, and ironically him also seeing you a bit/angry displeased because he's not listening during training times. He'll learn your reactions are different. Last Edited by Sol-tari on 09/13/2021 03:00 AM *Glitches May Occur. Consume(D) At Own Risk |
Agent 99
User ID: 77082640 United States 09/13/2021 03:40 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | Put away the camera!!! Trust me on this one. My dog who lived for 16 years was like my shadow, but the moment there was a camera in my hands, he was hiding and running away like your doggy. I used to think it was because he saw a flash from a photo and never got over it, but later I just think it was because something was pointing at him and directed at him. They are not stupid. They make up their minds about something and good luck ever changing them unless you change first. Quoting: retlawjones I had to stop playing my accordian because my 2 Pekingese dogs run away whenever I play it. sigh. Thank God you stopped playing that damn accordion. lol. |
tcs
User ID: 80104801 Canada 09/13/2021 03:58 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | Before you get a dog, play with it and turn it over gently and give it a light shaking with your hand. If it allows you to do this without being afraid or agitated, you're probably going to have a best friend for life. If it nips or bites you or acts terrified, that's a sign it's not your dog. " Thus saith the Lord; Cursed be the man that trusteth in man, and maketh flesh his arm, and whose heart departeth from the Lord." ~ Jer. 17:5 "From that time Jesus began to preach, and to say, Repent: for the kingdom of heaven is at hand" |
supporter
Loyal Order of the Secret Squirrels User ID: 80827334 Philippines 09/13/2021 04:28 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | She had it on temporary after spa surgery. Wife didn’t want her running around with the other dogs. Kept her on a leash for a few days. Do you just let your dogs run loose ? I love dogs but no dog now. I had a Golden retriever that would get the leash and thought he was walking me. Leash always in his mouth Had a samoyed. she never had a collar or leash. perfect trained. Gave her lots of freedom but when I told her she was always on my side touching me. I had a lot of dogs when I lived in the Med. They would just show up and live on the porch. I had a full size collie like lassie that showed up one day and stayed a couple years. It was a very senior dog and hated cars. It didn't bark at them or chase them it just layed in the middle of the street and refused to move. I gave them all the fresh water and Kibble they wanted.. Always Hide Your Nuts! --supporter |
Bershha
User ID: 78895838 Ukraine 09/13/2021 05:24 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
Wild Edibles
(OP) User ID: 79156981 United States 09/13/2021 05:43 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | I presume that you adopted the dog. It’s possible that you look like someone who may have traumatized her. Give it time. Quoting: RoyBatty That's what I'm thinking. When we lived out on the South Plains, we had tons of different dogs dumped off. Some were very protective of me and my daughter, but my husband and the boys, they would act alot like your pup. The only difference I noticed is our dogs would have their tail straight up. Yours has her tail tucked. She trusts you enough to eat from your hand, so I think she'll come around. Some dogs are just barkers. Someone suggested giving her scratches. That's a good idea. If you can give her a soft pet or scratch while you're feeding her, it might work. Just stop if she gets defensive. Give her some time. She'll come around. I've watched your other videos. You're good with critters. She'll figure it out. Watch her tail and you'll have a clue when she's over it all! I agree with these 2. May I also suggest lying down for a while and see if she comes around to you. Then cuddle or pet her for a while. I would try that every night til she comes around. You could also feed her then too. Small treats, whatever. We were thinking I could lay on the ground with some treats and see if she comes up to me. Learn something new each day,,,, And love your country!!! FJB |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 80696596 United States 09/13/2021 05:49 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | The dog has too much space. Quoting: IndyAnna Bring it in a room with you frequently. Do not try to bond with your dog, but allow it to do this at its own pace. You should be the only person to feed it. This bonding process works because the dog needs food. Use an old coat, or robe, to desensitize your pup to your smell. Put it where it sleeps. Make sure to wear the item of clothing for a while, prior to using to calm your pup. Trust should grow between you. Your pup will make an excellent companion dog once it accepts YOU are the alpha pack person. Be patient with your pup, and yourself. It takes time to grow a good friendship. IF that is what you want. I raised my last dog as a certified Therapy Animal. We went to hospitals, drug rehab places. She and I loved the work. She had become, in her old age, as a best friend. Best wishes with your new puppy. This. Never tamed a dog, but tamed several cats by putting them in smaller spaces, giving them items of my clothing, feeding & talking to them, scratching their ears when they allowed touch. |
KuvaszLove
User ID: 79936270 United States 09/13/2021 06:28 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
Wild Edibles
(OP) User ID: 76792073 United States 09/13/2021 07:07 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
Awake 11:11
User ID: 77928748 United States 09/13/2021 07:09 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | and sit down Rabbit Hole: A complexly bizarre or difficult state or situation conceived of as a hole into which one falls or descends. Dear FBI - Everything I write here is my opinion only, I have zero knowledge that is not readily available all over the internets. Save your resources. |
Sol-tari
User ID: 75858745 Australia 09/13/2021 07:13 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | I guess I’m one of those people that has to wear a pork chop around my neck so the dog will play with me. Quoting: Wild Edibles Lol how long have you had the dog mate? Current German shepard used to yelp and cower when anyone went to pat her. That includes me. You're just getting over that initial barrier. Basically saying to the dog "Yes, I know your past experience was shit. This is different" Once you get past this initial phase, you'll be laughing. Question: Do they react the same way when inside? If you're moving is he barking and running, or only in the yard? *Glitches May Occur. Consume(D) At Own Risk |
SkyTiger
User ID: 80681952 United States 09/13/2021 07:26 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | This caught my eye.... was it a Turkey you had on your farm, did the dog see the Turkey ALIVE prior to you butchering it, did she see you carry the turkey in to the kitchen or see any part of the butchering ...? If so, she sees you as a killer and that's why she's afraid of you, she doesn't understand that the yummy scraps you fed her came from the body of the resident turkey, if indeed that is the case that it was a home grown turkey... anyway, just throwing that out there as a possible reason.... good luck ! It's never too late to be who you are. |
Wild Edibles
(OP) User ID: 76792073 United States 09/13/2021 07:44 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
Wild Edibles
(OP) User ID: 76792073 United States 09/13/2021 07:45 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | I guess I’m one of those people that has to wear a pork chop around my neck so the dog will play with me. Quoting: Wild Edibles Lol how long have you had the dog mate? Current German shepard used to yelp and cower when anyone went to pat her. That includes me. You're just getting over that initial barrier. Basically saying to the dog "Yes, I know your past experience was shit. This is different" Once you get past this initial phase, you'll be laughing. Question: Do they react the same way when inside? If you're moving is he barking and running, or only in the yard? My wife brought her home a month and a half ago. She acts the same inside and outside. Learn something new each day,,,, And love your country!!! FJB |
rob2
User ID: 80802975 United States 09/13/2021 07:53 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | The dog has too much space. Quoting: IndyAnna Bring it in a room with you frequently. Do not try to bond with your dog, but allow it to do this at its own pace. You should be the only person to feed it. This bonding process works because the dog needs food. Use an old coat, or robe, to desensitize your pup to your smell. Put it where it sleeps. Make sure to wear the item of clothing for a while, prior to using to calm your pup. Trust should grow between you. Your pup will make an excellent companion dog once it accepts YOU are the alpha pack person. Be patient with your pup, and yourself. It takes time to grow a good friendship. IF that is what you want. I raised my last dog as a certified Therapy Animal. We went to hospitals, drug rehab places. She and I loved the work. She had become, in her old age, as a best friend. Best wishes with your new puppy. id say something similar. i will tell you OP, to TALK to the dog, like its another person. obviously someone hurt the dog before it came to you and it may have been someone who looks like you. be sincere and tell the baby it wont be hurt and how sorry you are someone did that. give him something like a treat.just put it down near him and let him go at his own pace. keep giving him treats when you see him/ \only YOU should give him those.it is just from you. keep at it, DO NOT LOSE YOUR PATIENCE. always let him come to you, not the other way around. |
Sol-tari
User ID: 75858745 Australia 09/13/2021 08:05 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | I guess I’m one of those people that has to wear a pork chop around my neck so the dog will play with me. Quoting: Wild Edibles Lol how long have you had the dog mate? Current German shepard used to yelp and cower when anyone went to pat her. That includes me. You're just getting over that initial barrier. Basically saying to the dog "Yes, I know your past experience was shit. This is different" Once you get past this initial phase, you'll be laughing. Question: Do they react the same way when inside? If you're moving is he barking and running, or only in the yard? My wife brought her home a month and a half ago. She acts the same inside and outside. You can take my above advise and do it inside then. It's a learnt behaviour. Sooner you work on it the better. When they do bark, again it's a non issue. Have a goal in mind when you go out to the yard - eg walk to the other side, touch the fence. Stand still for a minute and walk back. Same if you get up while inside and get a reaction. You can also use your other dog - call him over, couple pats, treat or toy, whatever - if both dogs are together while you're laying down. He'll be watching the interaction. Stuff together will work on building trust, and breaking the behaviour. Anyway mate, good luck. *Glitches May Occur. Consume(D) At Own Risk |
Overdue
User ID: 80335548 United States 09/13/2021 08:09 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | Dont be too nervous around them. Just go sit beside it a while. Let him see you. You can slowly get closer. May take time. |
Xeven
User ID: 80683137 United States 09/13/2021 08:14 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | Bingo. Plus I started feeding my dogs chicken and rice with carrots and beans. My 13 YO diabetic lab has never been better. Chicken breasts 1.99 lbs at Walmart. This food is cheaper than any dog food. 2 chicken breasts 3 Cups Rice Chicken broth Cup of shredded carrots Cup and half Canned green beans. 5 tablespoons olive oil Feeds my 4 dogs for 3 days. I also throw in any about to expire fruits and other veggies if I have any. They don’t seem to notice and it’s full of nutrition Last Edited by Xeven on 09/13/2021 08:16 AM I reserve the right to declare my comments and posts as satire. Nothing I post should be considered or interpreted as advocacy for illegal activity. My comments are designed to inspire critical political thinking. I only mean half of what I say and only say half of what I mean. |
MissApple
User ID: 80178093 United States 09/13/2021 08:18 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | No offence. but, yuck. there is no forced 'friendships'/trained/starved....there is only compromise. yuck. poor dog. 10/19/2021 Jdhtt 10/10/2021 You are beautiful in every single way.. ~*14*~ 10/10/2021 Idiot spammer 10/10/2021 Are you a red head? 10/10/2021 The silver apples of the moon, the golden apples of the sun 10/10/2021 Language yes. I am. australian at heart |
MissApple
User ID: 80178093 United States 09/13/2021 08:18 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | you're yuck. 10/19/2021 Jdhtt 10/10/2021 You are beautiful in every single way.. ~*14*~ 10/10/2021 Idiot spammer 10/10/2021 Are you a red head? 10/10/2021 The silver apples of the moon, the golden apples of the sun 10/10/2021 Language yes. I am. australian at heart |
TXGLP2
User ID: 80129212 United States 09/13/2021 08:44 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | Dogs love routine, they know what to expect and expect it to occur in a timely manner. Make a routine of laying down on the floor yourself close by to her. She will enjoy the upper hand for once, and sniff - then make NO sudden moves. Do this for several days and she may warm up. Also, voice is so important. Perhaps you have a deep voice. Time to engage your puppy voice - higher pitched, and in fact, a dog finds it impossible not to give sympathy to the mewling of puppies. Imitate a puppy vocally, high and soft, while laying down near her (but don't block her space), and reach your hand out to her on the floor. When I meet a friend's dog who is shy or hesitant, I will just lay right down on the floor and let the dog check me out. They always have more trust after that. |