Menopause Rhapsody - Bohemian Rhapsody Parody Song for every Queen

It sucks being a woman.

Fossy, I've got to say something not easy to talk about...but I'm going to.

I read some Anne Rice softcore porn about 15-20 years ago. Just that one book spun me into what I considered a dark place, sexually. It was not good for me.

Also, given I do think the sex act being shown to us and us wanting to experience it, is at least part and parcel of what led to Humanity's fall.

Please remember that I have had an OBE into a originally created human being and, straight up sister, there's no orgasm available that beats out being in that body. None.

So, while I do very much enjoy sex - I'm a freaking quadruple Scorpio... - I also have this kind of "disdain" for it. It ruined us. We lost a whole helluva lot because of it. I do very well see how sex and it's sickly "wanting" debases us....I'm sorry, I do see soft porn and porn as this. For me, at least.

The ONLY reason I have had sex in the last now nine years, have even considered to have sex, is because I love this man so very much, and I do want that bond between us....I do want us to be able to become "one" physically.


Heh, I guess I'm word vomiting this all out because it's a part of my struggle with my sexuality.

I do, I do enjoy sex. If I was more brazen I'd say how aloud....I mean, I still make my own juices, heh. That really surprised my GYN.

Personally, I think it's the product of a very deep love.


I can't trash my psyche with soft porn or anything of the sort. Love is enough for me. I think there are other women who are going to feel like me, even if it's not because of the particulars I've pointed out.

And I hope you're not going get upset with me, or feel like you've been bitch slapped, because that isn't what this post is about, okay?....I'm simply sharing my point of view.

As always, I love you dearly....

My biggest complaint is the sudden appearance of what I refer to as "menopause thickness".

I remember being in my 30s, looking at women over 50... they all had the thickness in that same spot. "They've all let themselves go!" I remember thinking. "That won't happen to me!"




Now here I am on the edge of 50. And pretty much overnight,
I now have this additional padding right under my ribs. I guess the fat from my formerly perky boobs went south?

Does it ever go away or am I now permanently bloated?

Hateful!!! Hateful potato body! I used to be a real looker, too!

Fuck it. Pass the cheesecake!

Heh, I used to be a looker, too--





--now I can't stand to look in the mirror...pfht, I can't even look at my skin without getting shoved out of shape. My hair has thinned a bit, and I have fine hair to begin with.

God help the jackass who comes at me with a camera....

It's so hateful....lol, I can't even with it, ya know?....

Nope darlin, I'm not offended at all. Just putting it out there out of love for my fellow sisters, hoping it helps someone.It would take a hella lot more than that to make me not love you!

Oh wow! we looked a lot alike!!!! could have been sisters!

that one youtube lady who says dump the sugar is right!
I gained some weight during lockdown.. Was eating man food and playing video games for a whole year. lol I cut out the sugar and diet sugar and now it's starting to go. It was hard but I am the boss of me as I like to say. It the only thing that works. Avocados, mushrooms, delightful cheeses, tofu (I am not a vegan I just happen to love that shit) That bitch named "salad" If I never see another salad... Olives, lots of tuna and salmon patties. just egg and garlic, salt. no crackers. then when I'm starting to wig out I go eat a hamburger. lol I lost 11 in ten days, gained 2 lost 3 gained 3 lost 2 a week later still 11 down. the reason it's not better is because I like to drink. lol Anyway, it works. it's not easy but it works. :( Seriously being a woman does kinda suck. I never even got to have the babies!!! I still have to deal with it all.

Ahhh, very good....

That's funny and cool we looked a lot alike....

oh gosh I put my pic here, it's giant! hang on.. I'll try to shrink it

Last Edited by Fossy on 06/15/2021 03:35 PM

eh, screw it. too much trouble on this computer. for some reason I lost my copy paste. probs have to reinstall the mouse. Maybe later.

didn't we? honestly you look familiar to me. I grew up in the Carthage /Joplin area. You anywhere close?

That's all the same person singing isn't it?

I'm not going to pretend to relate to it though. I'm glad I was born a man!

Funny and well presented!

Yes, it's the same woman.

My dad was in the service, so we moved around a lot. When you say Joplin, I'm thinking Missouri. I never lived there. Mostly CA, after I was about 11-ish.

I've always been told I look familiar to people, and on the other hand an old mate told me he was sure he could take 1,000 pictures of me, and I'd never look the same in any of them.

Lol, the only thing I know now is I'm uhg-ugly....


Not that bad, but might as well be....

Oh bullsh*T!!! I understand when you're a pretty girl all your youthful life, it's had to see maturity set in but you gotta let that girl go and embrace the beautiful mature lady you are. If you still got some pretty and I'm sure you do you're ahead of a lot of others and it's better to emphasize that instead of the other bits.

When I was younger I often thought about how I would react to aging. Back then at least, I would tell myself.
"Just be nice and hopefully your personality will carry you through....." Bwahahahahah!!!

Ah... I kill me.

Too much effort. And money.

I have a (I think 8oz) spray bottle filled with water to cool me down.
I also have cold hands to put on my hot neck when the need arises.

I like things simple & cheap.

Here's 2 sayings my mum always used to use:

It's not a hot flush, I'm having a power surge.

And her favourite for memory loss due to menopause:

It's just menopausal drift darling, Im off to the craft(can't remember a fucking thing) club.

A "power surge".......

Love that!!! Lol your mom sounds so cool!

Last Edited by Fossy on 06/16/2021 01:03 PM

Lol! Whatever floats your boat, right? We’re all unique.

Then the next day, I’m like “screw men, who needs them anyway.” Lol
Ai yi yi !