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I have 350,000,000 M&Ms

 
Oak_Redhammer
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User ID: 72994536
United States
04/24/2021 12:48 PM
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I have 350,000,000 M&Ms
I take all 350 Million M&Ms and I place them in a massive tumbler.
Then I take 100,000 cyanide pills that look exactly like M&Ms and I toss them in the tumbler too and mix them all together.

Then I use my incredible power to mandate that in order to participate in society that every man, woman and child must eat two M&Ms from the tumbler and if everyone does not eat from this tumbler then no one may participate in society.

This will force your neighbors to pressure you into eating them and if you do not you may even have to be locked away for your disobedience and I may even send men to your home with guns to force you to eat them.

To prove to you that it's ok I will myself eat two M&Ms and I will have professional actors that you trust also eat two M&Ms to show you that it is safe.
What I won't tell you is that neither I nor the actors will be eating from the same tumbler that I am forcing you to eat from but you don't need to concern yourself with these unimportant details.

If you hear about anyone dying after eating the M&Ms that is a conspiracy theory and any relationship between the M&Ms and an individuals sudden demise is completely unrelated and any suggestion that it is will be immediately censored and I will personally make you that you are deplatformed and silenced so that you can't infect others with your wild and false theories.
OU8122

User ID: 79553795
United States
04/24/2021 12:51 PM

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Re: I have 350,000,000 M&Ms
Explained in such a manner even the left SHOULD be able to understand.

Well done
OU8122
Oak_Redhammer  (OP)

User ID: 72994536
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04/24/2021 12:53 PM
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Re: I have 350,000,000 M&Ms
Explained in such a manner even the left SHOULD be able to understand.

Well done
 Quoting: OU8122


Maybe this will work?
DodgerFan

User ID: 80278780
Canada
04/24/2021 01:19 PM
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Re: I have 350,000,000 M&Ms
Explained in such a manner even the left SHOULD be able to understand.

Well done
 Quoting: OU8122


I don't think the left is smart enough to have any idea what OP is talking about. All they get out this is that if you eat the brown M&M's, then your obviously racist.
JustinKGunther

User ID: 80262179
Canada
04/24/2021 01:28 PM
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Re: I have 350,000,000 M&Ms
I pushed the pine button but it just won't pine.
My people- infants are their oppressors, and women rule over them. O my people, your guides mislead you and they have swallowed up the course of your paths.

"Because the poor are plundered, because the needy groan, I will now arise," says the Lord
Oak_Redhammer  (OP)

User ID: 72994536
United States
04/24/2021 01:28 PM
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Re: I have 350,000,000 M&Ms
I pushed the pine button but it just won't pine.
 Quoting: JustinKGunther


Give it a minute so it can grow.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 79612991
United States
04/24/2021 01:34 PM
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Re: I have 350,000,000 M&Ms
Excellent analogy. We live in Orwellian times.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 79227977
Canada
04/24/2021 01:37 PM
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Re: I have 350,000,000 M&Ms
should be titled:
I HAVE 350MILL DEATH M&M, BUT I HATH HIRED A STELLAR WINNING MARKETING TEAM THAT WILL TELL YOU THESE ARE THE GREATEST M&Ms. Taketh them or we will call you a murderer.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 79506279
United States
04/24/2021 01:44 PM
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Re: I have 350,000,000 M&Ms
Throw in 350,000,000 Reese's Pieces and I'll have a go at it


5a
Oak_Redhammer  (OP)

User ID: 72994536
United States
04/24/2021 04:49 PM
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Re: I have 350,000,000 M&Ms
should be titled:
I HAVE 350MILL DEATH M&M, BUT I HATH HIRED A STELLAR WINNING MARKETING TEAM THAT WILL TELL YOU THESE ARE THE GREATEST M&Ms. Taketh them or we will call you a murderer.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 79227977


Yeah, I missed my chance bigly
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 80063440
United States
04/24/2021 05:27 PM
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Re: I have 350,000,000 M&Ms
Oak_Redhammer  (OP)

User ID: 72994536
United States
04/24/2021 06:02 PM
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Re: I have 350,000,000 M&Ms

 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 80063440


Ahh, the 80s.
OI82Much

User ID: 80071849
Canada
04/24/2021 06:17 PM
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Re: I have 350,000,000 M&Ms
I take all 350 Million M&Ms and I place them in a massive tumbler.
Then I take 100,000 cyanide pills that look exactly like M&Ms and I toss them in the tumbler too and mix them all together.

Then I use my incredible power to mandate that in order to participate in society that every man, woman and child must eat two M&Ms from the tumbler and if everyone does not eat from this tumbler then no one may participate in society.

This will force your neighbors to pressure you into eating them and if you do not you may even have to be locked away for your disobedience and I may even send men to your home with guns to force you to eat them.

To prove to you that it's ok I will myself eat two M&Ms and I will have professional actors that you trust also eat two M&Ms to show you that it is safe.
What I won't tell you is that neither I nor the actors will be eating from the same tumbler that I am forcing you to eat from but you don't need to concern yourself with these unimportant details.

If you hear about anyone dying after eating the M&Ms that is a conspiracy theory and any relationship between the M&Ms and an individuals sudden demise is completely unrelated and any suggestion that it is will be immediately censored and I will personally make you that you are deplatformed and silenced so that you can't infect others with your wild and false theories.
 Quoting: Oak_Redhammer


This is why I eat Smarties®.
Oak_Redhammer  (OP)

User ID: 72994536
United States
04/24/2021 06:28 PM
Report Abusive Post
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Re: I have 350,000,000 M&Ms
I take all 350 Million M&Ms and I place them in a massive tumbler.
Then I take 100,000 cyanide pills that look exactly like M&Ms and I toss them in the tumbler too and mix them all together.

Then I use my incredible power to mandate that in order to participate in society that every man, woman and child must eat two M&Ms from the tumbler and if everyone does not eat from this tumbler then no one may participate in society.

This will force your neighbors to pressure you into eating them and if you do not you may even have to be locked away for your disobedience and I may even send men to your home with guns to force you to eat them.

To prove to you that it's ok I will myself eat two M&Ms and I will have professional actors that you trust also eat two M&Ms to show you that it is safe.
What I won't tell you is that neither I nor the actors will be eating from the same tumbler that I am forcing you to eat from but you don't need to concern yourself with these unimportant details.

If you hear about anyone dying after eating the M&Ms that is a conspiracy theory and any relationship between the M&Ms and an individuals sudden demise is completely unrelated and any suggestion that it is will be immediately censored and I will personally make you that you are deplatformed and silenced so that you can't infect others with your wild and false theories.
 Quoting: Oak_Redhammer


This is why I eat Smarties®.

 Quoting: OI82Much


I was always more of a Juicy Fruit guy.






GLP