I was 30 years old before I figured out women. Lessons learned inside.

I was raised in a religious home, in a religious community. Likewise, because of this, I was married young and had children young. For nearly ten years I thought I did everything right. I worked hard, made good money, often did housework, took care of the kids, and tried constantly to make my wife “happy”.

At 30 years old I was miserable. I felt like a checkbook, my wife was always a total nag, I got no respect, and even less sex. And whenever we finally did it felt like a chore.

That’s when a coworker of mine showed me the way, and I’ll be damned it if didn’t work.

Here were the things he told me to do, and he promised me within months my life would be different. Ive never looked back.

1)Shut Up. Your wife, girlfriend, will often get pissed or angry about something. Don’t defend yourself verbally. Don’t try to start explaining. Just go silent. It is counter intuitive but the peace I got from coming home and as soon as my wife started nagging about something just shutting her out... it drove her crazy. In a good way eventually. After about a month she started respecting me more. I wasn’t going to entertain bullshit and she knew it.

2)Gym Gym Gym. Lift big, lift heavy. This was so hard. I had let myself go. I had a total dad bod, a flabby belly, tiny arms. I started going to gym every afternoon after work. I became addicted to it after seeing results. The gym became my refuge. If the wife started in I would grab my gym bag and go hit an hour of reps. Other women really started noticing me after a couple of months. Waitresses, secretaries, clerks. I could see it, my wife could see it.

3)Stop giving in. If I didn’t agree with it anymore I didn’t do it. For so long I would just roll over. It’s Christmas, who’s parents are we going to see? What trip are we taking? Will you buy x instead of y. No. No. No. I started just calmly doing MY way again.

4)More time with the kids. Just me and them. I started taking my daughter fishing. My son shooting. If I was running an errand they were with ME, not the other way around.

Things really started changing about 4 months in. My wife really stated to “respect” me again, and had a genuine attraction. Sex is enthusiastic nod she often initiates it, and I get nagged nearly none (because she knows I just wont put up with it). 10 years later still doing all of the above, and counsel young men on these issues in my men’s group. It works.