Please send my family prayers, we could use all the love we can get. | |
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Texan Buckeye
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justanothergranny
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beeches
User ID: 78973486 United States 10/25/2020 10:40 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | Prayers said! You were very brave. She is in God's hands. Quoting: justanothergranny They can't keep Him out of the ER! Truth! Prayers daily for healing and full recovery of function for your aunt. you did good, OP. Prayers for your well-being too. Liberalism is totalitarianism with a human face – Thomas Sowell |
Sungaze_At_Dawn
User ID: 78899308 Canada 10/25/2020 10:41 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | Prayers sent for healing and grace, for everyone and for her. The Devil tries to convince everyone he doesn't exist. The state tries to convince everyone they cannot resist. Do not go quietly into the good night. Rage Rage against the dying light! |
Serenity Now
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tiger1
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Xenophon
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LindaE
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Brandywine
(OP) User ID: 75410582 United States 10/26/2020 12:40 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | Thank you so much for the heartfelt prayers. I appreciate each and every one of you! No word yet on her tests, I will update tomorrow as there will be more doctors and staff available to speak in the daytime. She is stable right now, and sedated but responded to stimuli earlier. That's something for me to rest on for the evening. I am so overwhelmed right now and can't pick an emotion, I don't know why I keep settling on guilt. But I can't help but feel it. All I wanted to do was pull over and do CPR (I am trained), but I knew an ambulance would not have gotten her there sooner. There was no time and it came out of nowhere and so fast. I feel guilty. I feel guilty because I know she told me she wanted a DNR a few years ago, but she never got paperwork for it. I feel guilty because I demanded they do everything in their power to keep her alive until her two kids got there, because they have the ultimate say, not me. I'm glad they got there before she was transferred to the ICU, they got to hold her hands. They got to tell her they loved her. But I just feel guilt. I know I'm being unreasonable with myself. I'd do it all over again the same way. Maybe its just exhaustion. Last Edited by Brandywine on 10/26/2020 01:26 AM Never be in a hurry; do everything quietly and in a calm spirit. Do not lose your inner peace for anything whatsoever, even if your whole world seems upset. ~Saint Francis de Sales To keep the body in good health is a duty... otherwise we shall not be able to keep our mind strong and clear. ~Buddha |
Texan Buckeye
User ID: 22937658 United States 10/26/2020 12:50 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | Thank you so much for the heartfelt prayers. I appreciate each and every one of you! No word yet on her tests, I will update tomorrow as there will be more doctors and staff available to speak in the daytime. She is stable right now, and sedated but responded to stimuli earlier. That's something for me to rest on for the evening. Quoting: Brandywine I am so overwhelmed right now and can't pick an emotion, I don't know why I keep settling on guilt. But I can't help but feel it. All I wanted to do was pull over and do CPR (I am trained), but I knew an ambulance would not have gotten her there sooner. There was no time and it came out of nowhere and so fast. I feel guilty. I feel guilty because I know she told me she wanted a DNR a few years ago, but she never got paperwork for it. I feel guilty because I demanded they do everything in their power to keep her alive until her two kids got there, because wltgwy have the ultimate say, not me. I'm glad they got there before she was transferred to the ICU, they got to hold her hands. They got to tell her they loved her. But I just feel guilt. I know I'm being unreasonable with myself. I'd do it all over again the same way. Maybe its just exhaustion. Thanks for the update, Brandywine. It sounds to me like you did the only thing you could do and it was the right thing. Don't let guilt take over you. It's a normal response to what you've been through tonight. What you're feeling is the first stage of grief. Grief isn't only felt after someone passes away, either. Don't beat yourself up, you're being very normal. Keep us posted in the morning and do your best to get good rest tonight. It'll be hard, but try. I'll check on you tomorrow and know when people here say they'll pray....they really do! |
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Meadow Hawk
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Bailey Howe
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panther0621
User ID: 27944307 United States 10/26/2020 05:11 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | Thank you so much for the heartfelt prayers. I appreciate each and every one of you! No word yet on her tests, I will update tomorrow as there will be more doctors and staff available to speak in the daytime. She is stable right now, and sedated but responded to stimuli earlier. That's something for me to rest on for the evening. Quoting: Brandywine I am so overwhelmed right now and can't pick an emotion, I don't know why I keep settling on guilt. But I can't help but feel it. All I wanted to do was pull over and do CPR (I am trained), but I knew an ambulance would not have gotten her there sooner. There was no time and it came out of nowhere and so fast. I feel guilty. I feel guilty because I know she told me she wanted a DNR a few years ago, but she never got paperwork for it. I feel guilty because I demanded they do everything in their power to keep her alive until her two kids got there, because they have the ultimate say, not me. I'm glad they got there before she was transferred to the ICU, they got to hold her hands. They got to tell her they loved her. But I just feel guilt. I know I'm being unreasonable with myself. I'd do it all over again the same way. Maybe its just exhaustion. Guilt is a feeling of traumatic stress. Getting it out on here and to someone you can talk to even a counselor will help the quicker you do so. You were one person. you got her to help as quick as you could. you would not have been able to do much with her in a car seat anyways CPR wise. you may have injured her more trying to get her out. you made the right call. Moments like that you go with you gut. I am sure you are exhausted. you may be so for a few days even. you did give her children a chance to be there and make the medical choices. I will pray for her and you and your family, for health, skill of the healthcare people, for healing, for strength, for the Holy spirit to grant you peace. Please understand you have nothing to feel guilty about. I also Pray God lets you know this. |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 72702052 United States 10/26/2020 05:19 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
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Servant-of-the-LORD
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ST37
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beeches
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Fluffy Pancakes
User ID: 75929767 United States 10/26/2020 10:04 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | Don't guilt yourself at all. You did the right thing, and if you think about it, had you not done what you did, you would be beating yourself up more. Will keep you all in prayer. Things are bad enough, there is no need to make anything up. ~Fluffy "Never interrupt an enemy in the process of destroying himself." Quercitin and zinc...Get it. Take it. Visit howbad.info...If you took the shot, for sure. |
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Brandywine
(OP) User ID: 75410582 United States 10/26/2020 10:24 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | So today I was able to sit with her for a few minutes, her covid test came back negative so one person at a time was allowed in. She was responsive, but not very much. I could tell she could hear me. But she wouldn't open her eyes. I know she did open her eyes with her kids when they asked if she wanted a DNR when her ventilator comes out. She opened them wide and nodded yes. Today doctors tried to lower the oxygen to see if the ventilator could be turned off and she started to crash. She's just not strong enough. Tomorrow morning, the ventilator is coming out. Today I got to tell her how much I love her. How much her brother (my Dad who she's lived with for 18 years) loves her. I told her I would take care of him no matter what, and for her not to worry about him. I said he wouldn't be alone, and she nodded her head and squeezed my hand (lightly). I know she could hear me. The doctors don't have high hopes. I could see it in their faces. Too much damage was done, and it apparently wasn't the first event she had, she had more that went untreated. I just pray she isn't in pain. I'm glad she and her Son and Daughter have a chance to say goodbye, many people don't get that. Never be in a hurry; do everything quietly and in a calm spirit. Do not lose your inner peace for anything whatsoever, even if your whole world seems upset. ~Saint Francis de Sales To keep the body in good health is a duty... otherwise we shall not be able to keep our mind strong and clear. ~Buddha |
Texan Buckeye
User ID: 22937658 United States 10/26/2020 11:04 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | You're a good person, Brandywine. Your aunt is lucky to have you in her life. I think she heard you, too. It's hard to let go of the people we love. I've lost both parents in the last 3 years. My mom passed last year with dementia. She didn't know us and couldn't talk at the end. It was the hardest and yet the easiest thing to tell her it was ok to let go and see dad and her family. She was ready. I miss her every day. When that time comes for your aunt, give her your blessing to move on. Her passing will be easier. Remind her of your love for her. Sending more prayers up for you all for peace of mind, comfort and love. I'm also asking for angels to guide the staff and your aunt. I promise they are there. |
JoeNobHead
User ID: 79525152 United States 10/27/2020 12:26 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | My aunt needs prayers. This weekend she had a cardiac event and died in my car. I got her to the ER and they brought her back. She is in the ICU right now and its touch and go. I can't go in there because of covid. Please, I don't ask for much, I beg for prayers. Quoting: Brandywine I've never felt so helpless in my entire life, knowing I needed to be doing CPR, but I was driving so all I could do was hold her up with one hand and drive with the other. Time was moving so slowly. She is alive, but she died two times, and was without oxygen and we don't know the extent of the damage yet because she needs to have a negative covid test before they will do a CT scan on her brain. The results should be back in an hour or two. I'm not religious, at all, but I will think positive thoughts and vibes. Hopefully it helps. And peace be with you and yours. I believe in science NOT religion. Giving me bad karma for that, is anti-religious (you're passing judgement) I am just a man. Of no significance. Who found religion to be full of lies, and wrong doing, conflicted teachings I understand microwave communications. I do not stand for the NWO, it sucks. |
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