Godlike Productions - Discussion Forum
Users Online Now: 1,433 (Who's On?)Visitors Today: 325,920
Pageviews Today: 530,830Threads Today: 155Posts Today: 3,014
06:32 AM


Rate this Thread

Absolute BS Crap Reasonable Nice Amazing
 

Uncomfortable Questions: Was the Death Star Attack an Inside Job?

 
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 141591
United States
02/28/2007 07:23 PM
Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Uncomfortable Questions: Was the Death Star Attack an Inside Job?
Uncomfortable Questions: Was the Death Star Attack an Inside Job?

Posted in Conspiracy Theories | Wednesday, February 28th, 2007 | Trackback

Websurdity Link: This article was inspired by the fine users at the James Randi Educational Foundation (JREF) Forum, to whom I am indebted for the use of much of this material.

We’ve all heard the “official conspiracy theory” of the Death Star attack. We all know about Luke Skywalker and his ragtag bunch of rebels, how they mounted a foolhardy attack on the most powerful, well-defended battle station ever built. And we’ve all seen the video over, and over, and over, of the one-in-a-million shot that resulted in a massive chain reaction that not just damaged, but completely obliterated that massive technological wonder.

Like many Americans, I was fed this story when I was growing up. But as I watched the video, I began to realize that all was not as it seemed. And the more I questioned the official story, the deeper into the rabbit hole I went.

Presented here are some of the results of my soul-searching regarding this painful event. Like many citizens, I have many questions that I would like answered: was the mighty Imperial government really too incompetent to prevent a handful of untrained nerf-herders from destroying one of their most prized assets? Or are they hiding something from us? Who was really behind the attack? Why did they want the Death Star destroyed? No matter what the answers, we have a problem.

Below is a summary of my book, Uncomfortable Questions: An Analysis of the Death Star Attack, which presents compelling evidence that we all may be the victims of a fraud of immense proportions.


Uncomfortable Questions about the Death Star Attack

The cover of Uncomfortable Questions: An Analysis of the Death Star Attack


1) Why were a handful of rebel fighters able to penetrate the defenses of a battle station that had the capability of destroying an entire planet and the defenses to ward off several fleets of battle ships?

2) Why did Grand Moff Tarkin refuse to deploy the station’s large fleet of TIE Fighters until it was too late? Was he acting on orders from somebody to not shoot down the rebel attack force? If so, who, and why?

3) Why was the rebel pilot who supposedly destroyed the Death Star reported to be on the Death Star days, maybe hours, prior to its destruction? Why was he allowed to escape, and why were several individuals dressed in Stormtrooper uniforms seen helping him?

4) Why has there not been an investigation into allegations that Darth Vader, the second-ranking member of the Imperial Government, is in fact the father of the pilot who allegedly destroyed the Death Star?

5) Why did Lord Vader decide to break all protocols and personally pilot a lightly armored TIE Fighter? Conveniently, this placed Lord Vader outside of the Death Star when it was destroyed, where he was also conveniently able to escape from a large-sized rebel fleet that had just routed the Imperial forces. Why would Lord Vader, one of the highest ranking members of the Imperial Government, suddenly decide to fly away from the Death Star in the middle of a battle? Did he know something that the rest of the Imperial Navy didn’t?

Emperor Palpatine fails to act after being informed of the attack


6) How could any pilot shoot a missile into a 2 meter-wide exhaust port, let alone a pilot with no formal training, whose only claim to fame was his ability to “bullseye womprats” on Tatooine? This shot, according to one pilot, would be “impossible, even for a computer.” Yet, according to additional evidence, the pilot who allegedly fired the missile turned off his targeting computer when he was supposedly firing the shot that destroyed the Death Star. Why have these discrepancies never been investigated, let alone explained?

7) Why has their been no investigation into evidence that the droids who provided the rebels with the Death Star plans were once owned by none other than Lord Vader himself, and were found, conveniently, by the pilot who destroyed the Death Star, and who is also believed to be Lord Vader’s son? Evidence also shows that the droids were brought to one Ben Kenobi, who, records indicate, was Darth Vader’s teacher many years earlier! Are all these personal connections between the conspirators and a key figure in the Imperial government supposed to be coincidences?

8) How could a single missile destroy a battle station the size of a moon? No records, anywhere, show that any battle station or capital ship has ever been destroyed by a single missile. Furthermore, analysis of the tape of the last moments of the Death Star show numerous small explosions along its surface, prior to it exploding completely! Why does all evidence indicate that strategically placed explosives, not a single missile, is what destroyed the Death Star?
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 159943
United States
02/28/2007 07:25 PM
Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Uncomfortable Questions: Was the Death Star Attack an Inside Job?
lol

The Emperor was the one that gave them the plans, how is that not an inside job?
Lucian Ilea

User ID: 202593
Romania
02/28/2007 07:37 PM
Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Uncomfortable Questions: Was the Death Star Attack an Inside Job?
Hackers penetrated the Moon station and trigger it to destroy Alcor 4
The hackers were from the Altarian resistence
The rest is story and history
In Arvena Neo et in Arcadia Ego
I am an Atlantean living in Atlantis when it flew again :)
ZAL Moxe
Wedge Antilles
User ID: 202628
United Kingdom
02/28/2007 08:29 PM
Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Uncomfortable Questions: Was the Death Star Attack an Inside Job?
Weeeeeeeeell...actually, I was Luke's wingman during the final approach on the Death Star's thermal exhaust port and didn't see anything untowards happening.

In fact, I had a pop at one of those them there Death Stars in the climatic battle of Endor. What a rush!
marduk
User ID: 155675
Croatia
03/02/2007 04:38 AM
Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Uncomfortable Questions: Was the Death Star Attack an Inside Job?
funny but:

bsflag
Thanatos

User ID: 159000
United States
03/02/2007 04:48 AM
Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Uncomfortable Questions: Was the Death Star Attack an Inside Job?
The X-wing was clearly a hologram, as part of the plot by the Emperor to justify the Hoth invasion in pursuit of precious solid-state dihydrogen monoxide deposits. I have ten witnesses who say they saw Jar Jar Binks fleeing the scene with an empty sack of thermal detonators too.
Rarrgh!
Kerwin

User ID: 196597
United Kingdom
03/02/2007 05:33 AM
Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Uncomfortable Questions: Was the Death Star Attack an Inside Job?
The 'kill shot' was fired by an imperial turncoat called "L. H. Oswald".

He used a shoulder mounted plasma cannon with an optical sight. Quite an antique, even then.

He was standing at the end of the trench on a spot cristened "the glassy knoll"

Computer simulations show that 3 shots were fired, the final shot hitting the port cover square on and pushing it 'back and to the left' which allowed the plasma burst to enter the port, destroying the Death Star.
Kerwin.


“The search for truth is more precious than its possession.”
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 203268
Belgium
03/02/2007 05:59 AM
Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Uncomfortable Questions: Was the Death Star Attack an Inside Job?
A lame attempt at humour by a little club of skeptibunkers
who are selectively "Skeptical".
Why is this nonsense pinned ?
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 203268
Belgium
03/02/2007 06:09 AM
Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Uncomfortable Questions: Was the Death Star Attack an Inside Job?
DrPostman,your stupid non-reply says more about you than
about me.As a moderator,why don't you answer the question?
Why is this lame attempt at humour by a bunch of selective
skeptibunkers (Who amazingly swallow the "official" story hook line and sinker without being "skeptical" at all)
pinned ?
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 107433
United States
03/02/2007 06:15 AM
Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Uncomfortable Questions: Was the Death Star Attack an Inside Job?
Funny! Very clever! Love it!
JS
User ID: 196509
United Kingdom
03/02/2007 06:23 AM
Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Uncomfortable Questions: Was the Death Star Attack an Inside Job?
Funny! Very clever! Love it!
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 107433



I think hes putting a little to much belief in Hans Solo's marksmanship ... for it was Hans Solo that shot Lord Vader which sent him spinning out into deep space with his ship out of control...is the Op trying to suggest that hans Solo's shot was part of the plan ....?

By the time He Lord Vader had gained control of his Tie fighter the Death Star was doomed.

regards
JS
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 197584
United States
03/02/2007 06:35 AM
Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Uncomfortable Questions: Was the Death Star Attack an Inside Job?
I heard a report that there were explosives rigged in the basement of the deathstar. If you review the film in slow motion, it appears that the deathstar was destroyed by a controlled demolition
LOCKED & LOADED

User ID: 16644
New Zealand
03/02/2007 06:47 AM
Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Uncomfortable Questions: Was the Death Star Attack an Inside Job?
Seek the power of the 'Force' Anonymous Coward
User ID: 141591 and you shall find the answers your looking for,
Ready To Rumble!
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 140809
United States
03/02/2007 06:54 AM
Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Uncomfortable Questions: Was the Death Star Attack an Inside Job?
Funny and well written.
Dervish

User ID: 202301
United Arab Emirates
03/02/2007 07:03 AM
Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Uncomfortable Questions: Was the Death Star Attack an Inside Job?
I don't believe the official 911 story either. But man thats very funny!


Dervish
I know enough to know that I know nothing
Darkzero63II

User ID: 106180
United States
03/02/2007 07:18 AM
Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Uncomfortable Questions: Was the Death Star Attack an Inside Job?
I thought everyone knew it was the Bothans. Those inside guys with the weird headsets for ears seen in Jedi...
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 153955
United States
03/02/2007 07:26 AM
Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Uncomfortable Questions: Was the Death Star Attack an Inside Job?
It was an outside job!! Those rebel scums did it! There were rebel passports founded floating in space with all the Death Star debris and picked up by the Imperial Space Fire/Search/Rescue units.

There were a lot of charred bodies floating in space as well! Hundreds of thousands!
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 203268
Belgium
03/02/2007 07:28 AM
Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Uncomfortable Questions: Was the Death Star Attack an Inside Job?
>Who snuck up on, kidnapped, and
>ruthlessly gang raped your sense of humor...

This has nothing to do with my sense of humor,but
with their (The skeptibunkers) underlying intention
of ridiculing those who have questions on the
"official" story...
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 203287
United States
03/02/2007 07:30 AM
Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Uncomfortable Questions: Was the Death Star Attack an Inside Job?
Don't forget the dancing Wookies! That were spotted near their van in New Jersey.
5a
Bean There
User ID: 203288
United States
03/02/2007 07:32 AM
Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Uncomfortable Questions: Was the Death Star Attack an Inside Job?
Who collected on the Insurance?
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 74049
United States
03/02/2007 07:49 AM
Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Uncomfortable Questions: Was the Death Star Attack an Inside Job?
OPie = applause
Tomek
User ID: 189887
Poland
03/02/2007 08:18 AM
Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Uncomfortable Questions: Was the Death Star Attack an Inside Job?
Seek the power of the 'Force' Anonymous Coward
User ID: 141591 and you shall find the answers your looking for,
 Quoting: LOCKED & LOADED


than answer can not be giving here because is to long to fool you
Tomek
User ID: 189887
Poland
03/02/2007 08:20 AM
Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Uncomfortable Questions: Was the Death Star Attack an Inside Job?
Seek the power of the 'Force' Anonymous Coward
User ID: 141591 and you shall find the answers your looking for,
 Quoting: LOCKED & LOADED


the answer could not be givin to Luke or skywalker all this years because ...
Tomek
User ID: 189887
Poland
03/02/2007 08:21 AM
Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Uncomfortable Questions: Was the Death Star Attack an Inside Job?
direct answer on email simpl easy way for example


why not done if it was simple ?
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 203287
United States
03/02/2007 08:39 AM
Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Uncomfortable Questions: Was the Death Star Attack an Inside Job?
No Wookies died when the Death Star blew up. They were warned ahead of time.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 200795
United States
03/02/2007 08:42 AM
Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Uncomfortable Questions: Was the Death Star Attack an Inside Job?
Everyone is aware Star Wars was just a movie, right?

And impossible things happen in movies. Never seen Luke Skywalker take a dump... makes for a poor theatre experience (or maybe not).

Point is... shit like this; and shit like the 9/11 official story, only happen in movies.
Emperor Kenton
User ID: 202810
United States
03/02/2007 09:10 AM
Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Uncomfortable Questions: Was the Death Star Attack an Inside Job?
Saturn's moon is Death Star's twin
[link to www.newscientist.com]
Tomek
User ID: 189887
Poland
03/02/2007 09:21 AM
Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Uncomfortable Questions: Was the Death Star Attack an Inside Job?
Im christian and tell me How christians can be dead ?
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 198733
United States
03/02/2007 09:25 AM
Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Uncomfortable Questions: Was the Death Star Attack an Inside Job?
Is it also true that the pilot that fired the shot was Darth Vaders Son?

I mean, come on!

If that is not a goood sign of an inside job, what is?

*At least how likely would it be in real life?
Mickey Martian

User ID: 141255
United States
03/02/2007 09:33 AM
Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Uncomfortable Questions: Was the Death Star Attack an Inside Job?
It's stupid. And coming from someone like James Randi I'm not surprised.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 200795
United States
03/02/2007 09:40 AM
Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Uncomfortable Questions: Was the Death Star Attack an Inside Job?
Im christian and tell me How christians can be dead ?
 Quoting: Tomek 189887


Not that I know how this pertains, but I'm willing to answer...

Christ is the Alpha and the Omega. He is there, before you were born... and he is there now, after you are dead. Both places at present.

Your perceptions are recorded directly to memory and processed by your mind from there... this is a neurological fact. Therefore, everything you experience -- even when you're in the present moment -- is already dead and gone by the time realize it.

Now that you know you're already dead; you're free to live your life for the first time. Your plans and dreams are an attempt by consciousness to give continuity to itself and somehow extend your consciousness forever. But you're already dead and the universe has already ended.

You just haven't realized yet it was all only and always just a word spoken by God; that was gone as soon as it reached your ear.

Now live your life in persistent awe of the one who spoke it, and die to your own self-serving needs. Or not... screw it; God created us to experience every emotion -- go smoke crack for all I care.





GLP