So I have my family Christmas get together coming up, and every year we do a round robin "white elephant" gift exchange and I for the life of me CANNOT think of anything this year.

Some of my past gems have included:

- Jesus action figure with AK-47
- Cooking with Semen cookbook
- A 12 month calendar with pictures of me in a bubble bath
- A meth lab starter kit

and perhaps my favorite ...

Shave Me Barbie ... with real pubic hair glued on.

I'm out of ideas, and thus I come to you for assistance, with the following caveats ... I must be able to purchase the item outright, or procure the necessary items in the next 10 days.

I really don't wanna have to buy booze ... Help me out GLP!