President Ted Cruz's first "State of the Union" address

His first speech will be in jail.

".......Since I'm a "Conservative Christian" I've decided that I need to be of one accord with my wife, and join the Council on Foreign Relations. Of course, our Secretary of the Treasury will be from Goldman Sachs, because I despise New York values. Speaking of which, not only will we be selling Fighter Jets to Israel for $1 each, I will personally allow Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu to corn hole me on National Television. I feel we owe them that.....and so much more.
Regarding auditing the Fed, I've decide there's no need to do that. After all, they're all Zionist Bankers, and if you can't trust them, who can you trust? Can I get an amen from the Evangelicals?
We'll be launching a new War in the Middle East. I haven't decided who we're fighting yet, or why. But, I'll be flying to Israel today, and will be told there."

it was a horrible nuclear dirty bomb attack on (insert city here)

we must invade Iran because Iran gave Isis the dirty bomb, and also Syria because it has become a safe haven for terrorist

the terrorist hate our freedoms

yes invade Iran and Syria

invade

"Tomorrow,.....
I will meet with the Canadian and Mexican President to sign the creation of the North American Union"