I hate when people ask "How Are You?" and you really are not good but they dont want to hear it

We all have our problems and its just another form of hello without the free councilling service.

Contrary to what you think, there are people who when asking that question are sincere. I am a living example.

I always tell people the truth when they ask a question. Yes, I try to honestly be happy, or at least positive, but if you ask, I'll tell you what's going on.

What I don't do is give the whole story.

If they ask how I'm doing and I feel cruddy from the flue, fat and unattractive, I'll just say something like "I could be better, how are you doing?"

If they want to know more they can ask. Or not. I'm fine with either.

:)

If I knew you I would avoid eye contact after I asked.

Look. Howya. Look away before you answer.

because most people are suck asses

You're right, OP. All the requestor wants to hear you say is, "Fine."

Same here.I never ask unless I have time to respond to the person if they want to talk and I make an effort to hear them out.Sometimes just talking a bit really helps someone.

Bless you both, for you are rare.

Not for too much longer we will be rare :)

Sara,

In Britain, the common greeting is "How do you do."

Notice that there's no question mark. The correct response is: "How do you do."

Think of "How are you." as "hi", and respond with a greeting, rather than an answer.

I always tell my true feeling when I'm asked. They would prefer I say I'm great, because they truly do not care how I am.

Well it has made me feel better a few times when someone took time to talk to me.Some of the elderly especially are lonely and love to chat a few minutes.There will be time when nothing else is still standing and it never hurt anyone to take a few minutes of their time to be nice to another person.
Sometimes you can just look at a person and tell they are lonely.Cashiers I tend to notice often if they seem stressed and I always try to make them feel a little better by asking them about their day.Has it been a busy work day etc.We never really know what a person is silently going through and a little kindness goes a long way.

For me it's servers at semi-fast food restaurants. They all too often become part of the scenery, and I try to find ways to tell them, "You matter to me."

Hi was somehow repalced by "How are you". I hate it too and always reply with "hi".

:irsjf:

I think what most people want is to be "seen."

Yes!

I went to checkout at the grocery store Sunday and the girl said how are you but didn't even look at me.

Just makes me sick. I looked at her and didn't say anything back.

Just annoying

So do I!

Funny thing is not many people notice I didn't answer their question.

Because they probably didn't notice they asked it in the first place!

and Monday's are the worse, every Monday the same people ask how was your weekend, like its so exciting, and like they give a shit, and really its just a prelude for them to ramble about there weekend (which they think is soo interesting), i even had the same person ask me twice how my weekend was, iyiyiyi; and the Holiday's are even worse

I usually say groovy, I don't get much after that.

Nonsense. You can't possibly invest in the general well-being of everyone you encounter. It's not emotionally possible. If 10 people in a row actually spilled their guts to you you would just stop asking.

I try my best not to burden anyone with my issues.

Except that there are people who will simply keep repeating the question, AS a question, if you just say "hi". Been there.

Agreed and it is really none of their business.

That's why I never ask anyone how they are doing. I don't really care.

Stop being a fucking coward and tell people how you feel. Then don't feel bad about it.

You'll probably start to feel better!