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BREAKING!!!!! A STORM IS COMING.

 
daretospeak  (OP)

User ID: 2734614
United Kingdom
10/05/2011 08:46 PM
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Re: BREAKING!!!!! A STORM IS COMING.
When Gold hits $1117 per scrap
and bananas per kilo top $59.99
an order for cigarettes will breach $330,
know we've crossed the demarcation line.

A storm approaches with forewarning
The black hawk, surveying the sheep
Super soldiers march at morning
Etching a motif, while you sleep.

None shall enter the chambers within
Unless he bares the motif of skin
Better you head for the highest of hills
To hide from the order of government shills.

Mass hysteria, far and far wide
Which way is up? And who moved the tide?
Run from the rain, of fire from the skies
I've tried to warn you, will you open your eyes?

This much I say, this much is true!
We must see red, but first see blue.
Thirst and hunger, plague and flu
Must come to pass before He makes all things new.

(c) TROY JONES 2011
Thats me...yes I wrote this.
 Quoting: daretospeak


That's wicked cool man.
 Quoting: GeekOfTheWeek

thanx
Galatians 2:20 I have been crucified with Christ, it is no longer I that live, but Christ now lives in me and the life I live in the flesh, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself for me.
daretospeak  (OP)

User ID: 2734614
United Kingdom
10/05/2011 08:48 PM
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Re: BREAKING!!!!! A STORM IS COMING.
...


Motif definition, "a single or repeated design or color".

In this case I used motif to describe a single design.
so you can "etch a motif"

A motif of skin meaning a single design etched onto the skin.
 Quoting: daretospeak


I hear you, and your choices aren't off, but your poetry teacher would say, "Meh. Your audience isn't in your head and won't make these 'motif' connections: too cryptic for most. Also, it's repetive: keep one or the other if you must, but not both."

Poeple who take peotry classes hear this shit all the time.
Still cool.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1433040


Point taken...I'll see if I can tweek it.
 Quoting: daretospeak


Remember, no poem is ever finished...just published.
Keep writing for sure.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1433040


I dont believe the no poem is ever finished part. I think some poems are perfect the way they are....not mine though, mine need work.
Galatians 2:20 I have been crucified with Christ, it is no longer I that live, but Christ now lives in me and the life I live in the flesh, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself for me.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 1394135
United States
10/05/2011 08:52 PM
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Re: BREAKING!!!!! A STORM IS COMING.
When Gold hits $1117 per scrap
and bananas per kilo top $59.99
an order for cigarettes will breach $330,
know we've crossed the demarcation line.

A storm approaches with forewarning
The black hawk, surveying the sheep
Super soldiers march at morning
Etching a motif, while you sleep.

None shall enter the chambers within
Unless he bares the motif of skin
Better you head for the highest of hills
To hide from the order of government shills.

Mass hysteria, far and far wide
Which way is up? And who moved the tide?
Run from the rain, of fire from the skies
I've tried to warn you, will you open your eyes?

This much I say, this much is true!
We must see red, but first see blue.
Thirst and hunger, plague and flu
Must come to pass before He makes all things new.

(c) TROY JONES 2011
Thats me...yes I wrote this.
 Quoting: daretospeak


Bollox
Stand your ground.
Nobody won anything by running away and leaving all behind,
Save for dunkirque, and that was by an america that died decades ago.
Now, it's hold fast, or hope has passed, either way, yer dead meat if you dont prevail
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 1394135
United States
10/05/2011 08:55 PM
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Re: BREAKING!!!!! A STORM IS COMING.
whatta buncha poofter runaway babies you lot are, run away, far far away bitch, like saving your selfish arse is a gift to someone, g'ahead save your scurvy arse for....?
daretospeak  (OP)

User ID: 2734614
United Kingdom
10/05/2011 09:02 PM
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Re: BREAKING!!!!! A STORM IS COMING.
When Gold hits $1117 per scrap
and bananas per kilo top $59.99
an order for cigarettes will breach $330,
know we've crossed the demarcation line.

A storm approaches with forewarning
The black hawk, surveying the sheep
Super soldiers march at morning
Etching a motif, while you sleep.

None shall enter the chambers within
Unless he bares the motif of skin
Better you head for the highest of hills
To hide from the order of government shills.

Mass hysteria, far and far wide
Which way is up? And who moved the tide?
Run from the rain, of fire from the skies
I've tried to warn you, will you open your eyes?

This much I say, this much is true!
We must see red, but first see blue.
Thirst and hunger, plague and flu
Must come to pass before He makes all things new.

(c) TROY JONES 2011
Thats me...yes I wrote this.
 Quoting: daretospeak


Bollox
Stand your ground.
Nobody won anything by running away and leaving all behind,
Save for dunkirque, and that was by an america that died decades ago.
Now, it's hold fast, or hope has passed, either way, yer dead meat if you dont prevail
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1394135


If my survival depended on running away so that I could live to protect my family then it is not cowardly but wise.
Galatians 2:20 I have been crucified with Christ, it is no longer I that live, but Christ now lives in me and the life I live in the flesh, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself for me.
daretospeak  (OP)

User ID: 2742856
United Kingdom
10/05/2011 11:07 PM
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Re: BREAKING!!!!! A STORM IS COMING.
bump
Galatians 2:20 I have been crucified with Christ, it is no longer I that live, but Christ now lives in me and the life I live in the flesh, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself for me.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 1637298
United States
10/05/2011 11:43 PM
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Re: BREAKING!!!!! A STORM IS COMING.
Any support for why you think it's crap?

Example: the word "motif" doesn't quite work here. Seems not as accurate. Can't etch a motif. And motif of skin? What does that mean? It's still not crap, and no peom is ever finished.


Motif definition, "a single or repeated design or color".

In this case I used motif to describe a single design.
so you can "etch a motif"

A motif of skin meaning a single design etched onto the skin.

As stated above a motif is "a single or repeated design or color". It can be carved repeatedly into your thoughts, your mind, a dream or a memory let alone your skin. This is a telling bit of prose and poetic in the picture it creates of a once great country that's becoming nightmarish to anyone who is awake. We are in a world poised for cataclysmic change and we each will decide what this means to us. Thank you Troy.
Heart Light
User ID: 1430445
United States
10/05/2011 11:45 PM
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Re: BREAKING!!!!! A STORM IS COMING.
Awesome poem --- more of THIS
Judethz

User ID: 1547630
United Kingdom
10/05/2011 11:47 PM
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Re: BREAKING!!!!! A STORM IS COMING.
an order for cigarettes will breach $330,
know we've crossed the demarcation line.

 Quoting: daretospeak


stoner Thread: Starting and Growing Tobacco from Seeds. New Hope Seed Company: Bringing back old tobacco varities from days gone by. No hybrids... No GMO's
daretospeak  (OP)

User ID: 1455775
United Kingdom
10/06/2011 12:28 AM
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Re: BREAKING!!!!! A STORM IS COMING.
Awesome poem --- more of THIS
 Quoting: Heart Light 1430445


Thanx.
Galatians 2:20 I have been crucified with Christ, it is no longer I that live, but Christ now lives in me and the life I live in the flesh, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself for me.
daretospeak  (OP)

User ID: 1455775
United Kingdom
10/06/2011 12:38 AM
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Re: BREAKING!!!!! A STORM IS COMING.
an order for cigarettes will breach $330,
know we've crossed the demarcation line.

 Quoting: daretospeak


stoner Thread: Starting and Growing Tobacco from Seeds. New Hope Seed Company: Bringing back old tobacco varities from days gone by. No hybrids... No GMO's
 Quoting: Judethz


Huh??????????
Galatians 2:20 I have been crucified with Christ, it is no longer I that live, but Christ now lives in me and the life I live in the flesh, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself for me.
daretospeak  (OP)

User ID: 1455775
United Kingdom
10/06/2011 12:39 AM
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Re: BREAKING!!!!! A STORM IS COMING.
Any support for why you think it's crap?

Example: the word "motif" doesn't quite work here. Seems not as accurate. Can't etch a motif. And motif of skin? What does that mean? It's still not crap, and no peom is ever finished.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1637298


Motif definition, "a single or repeated design or color".

In this case I used motif to describe a single design.
so you can "etch a motif"

A motif of skin meaning a single design etched onto the skin.

As stated above a motif is "a single or repeated design or color". It can be carved repeatedly into your thoughts, your mind, a dream or a memory let alone your skin. This is a telling bit of prose and poetic in the picture it creates of a once great country that's becoming nightmarish to anyone who is awake. We are in a world poised for cataclysmic change and we each will decide what this means to us. Thank you Troy.


Not just your country....but the WORLD.
Galatians 2:20 I have been crucified with Christ, it is no longer I that live, but Christ now lives in me and the life I live in the flesh, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself for me.
daretospeak  (OP)

User ID: 2755840
United Kingdom
10/06/2011 03:56 AM
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Re: BREAKING!!!!! A STORM IS COMING.
bump
Galatians 2:20 I have been crucified with Christ, it is no longer I that live, but Christ now lives in me and the life I live in the flesh, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself for me.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 529896
Australia
10/06/2011 04:15 AM
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Re: BREAKING!!!!! A STORM IS COMING.
Copying Mother Shiptons style i see. Sorry but she did it better.
daretospeak  (OP)

User ID: 2756338
United Kingdom
10/06/2011 04:15 AM
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Re: BREAKING!!!!! A STORM IS COMING.
Copying Mother Shiptons style i see. Sorry but she did it better.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 529896


Who is mother shipton?
Galatians 2:20 I have been crucified with Christ, it is no longer I that live, but Christ now lives in me and the life I live in the flesh, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself for me.
daretospeak  (OP)

User ID: 2756797
United Kingdom
10/06/2011 04:26 AM
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Re: BREAKING!!!!! A STORM IS COMING.
Copying Mother Shiptons style i see. Sorry but she did it better.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 529896


Who is mother shipton?
 Quoting: daretospeak


bump
Galatians 2:20 I have been crucified with Christ, it is no longer I that live, but Christ now lives in me and the life I live in the flesh, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself for me.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 1376109
United States
10/06/2011 04:30 AM
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Re: BREAKING!!!!! A STORM IS COMING.
+10
daretospeak  (OP)

User ID: 2756797
United Kingdom
10/06/2011 04:41 AM
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Re: BREAKING!!!!! A STORM IS COMING.
+10
 Quoting: hanchi


By the way...what exactly is +10 or any other + number?
Galatians 2:20 I have been crucified with Christ, it is no longer I that live, but Christ now lives in me and the life I live in the flesh, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself for me.
daretospeak  (OP)

User ID: 2760641
United Kingdom
10/06/2011 07:53 AM
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Re: BREAKING!!!!! A STORM IS COMING.
bumpitybumpbump
Galatians 2:20 I have been crucified with Christ, it is no longer I that live, but Christ now lives in me and the life I live in the flesh, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself for me.





GLP