Hamlet´s Cat´s Soliloquy .... A Pressie for my Beloved Mogs! | |
~Marianne~ (OP) User ID: 12046 New Zealand 09/26/2005 09:14 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | Politically correct cat definitions My cat does not barf hairballs; he is a floor/rug redecorator. My cat does not break things; she helps gravity do its job. My cat does not fear dogs; they are merely sprint practice tools. My cat does not gobble; she eats with alacrity. My cat does not scratch; he is a furniture/rug/skin ventilator. My cat does not yowl; he is singing off-key. My cat is not a "shedding machine;" she is a hair relocation stylist. My cat is not a "treat-seeking missile;" she enjoys the proximity of food. My cat is not a bed hog; he is a mattress appreciator. My cat is not a chatterbox; she is advising me on what to do next. My cat is not a dope addict; she is catnip appreciative. My cat is not a lap fungus; he is bed selective. My cat is not a pest; she is attention deprived. My cat is not a ruthless hunter; she is a wildlife control expert. My cat is not evil; she is badness enhanced. My cat is not fat; he is mass enhanced. My cat is not hydrophobic; she has an inability to appreciate moisture. My cat is not lazy; he is motivationally challenged. My cat is not underfoot; she is shepherding me to my next destination, the food dish. hehehe |
Mogs User ID: 26028 United States 09/26/2005 09:36 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | Thankyou Selkie. I was outside in the dark this morning having a ciggy and a feral cat popped up from the dumpster and locked eyes with me the soliloguy you share says much better than I what seemed to pass between that catīs wildness and my attempt at domestication it was curious of me and I curious of the wild then with a leap and a silent plop the kitty turned its eyes one last time to me then smoothed off into the dark morn it had chosen as I I would trade places to be care free no strictures of man skinny but wild confident leisure no collar or roof that would be the life for me. --Mogs |
~Marianne~ (OP) User ID: 12046 New Zealand 09/26/2005 09:47 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
1 | A pressie for Mogs | 05/20/06 |
2 | A Chrissie Pressie for my Mogs *kiss | 12/24/04 |